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orgasm gap bridgerton
orgasm gap bridgerton
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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

‘Bridgerton’s Take On Orgasming (Or Not) During Sex Is So Refreshing

Dear gentle reader, the Bridgerton we know and love is full of steamy sex and loud, obnoxious, life-changing orgasms. It’s cheesy, and definitely not what first-time sex feels like for most new couples, but exaggerated ecstasy has always been part of the Bridgerton fantasy. However, Season 4 turns that notion on its head with Francesca’s struggle to orgasm. And honestly, the realism is so refreshing.

Francesca, the sixth Bridgerton sibling, married her quiet sweetheart, Lord John Kilmartin, in Season 3. Though the show heavily hints that Francesca has feelings for John’s cousin Michaela, Francesca and John share a peaceful, loving marriage throughout Season 4. That is, until John gently asks whether Francesca is reaching her “pinnacle” — in other words, if she’s reaching orgasm. Sweet Franny girl says yes, despite having no clue what a pinnacle actually is. This sends her on a rampage, interrogating her sister-in-law and mother with awkward sex ed questions. 

After a few deeply unhelpful explanations, Francesca comes clean to John after faking an orgasm during sex. Hearing Francesca say, “Forgive me, I do not know what is wrong with me,” broke a piece of my heart. Not just for Francesca, but for every woman who has ever felt dysfunctional during sex.

John responds in the most perfect way. “Whatever you wish for in life, I will always endeavor to give it to you. Children. Pinnacles. But I also hope you know that you are just right as you are,” he tells her. “We are just right as we are right now, and we have all the time in the world for the rest.” The emotional rawness and a partner who simply wants her to feel good? Chills. 

Francesca’s storyline is a hard-hitting one because it’s honest. According to a 2024 study from the International Society For Sexual Medicine, women self-reported having an orgasm during intercourse only 46% to 58% of the time, while men reported nearly 30% higher on average. The orgasm gap is painfully familiar to modern women, making this Regency-era dilemma feel surprisingly current. 

What makes talk of the orgasm gap in Bridgerton even more revolutionary, though, is that she and John don’t try to “fix” a “problem.” They simply lay out the facts and focus on enjoying the connection they share during sex, instead of worrying about reaching orgasm.

Lilly Sparks, founder & CEO of Afterglow, an ethical porn site that helps teach viewers to have healthy sex, says that when someone is struggling to orgasm, “The most important thing a partner can do is remove pressure. Difficulty reaching orgasm often already comes with self-criticism. Your job isn’t to fix it, but to make it clear they’re not broken.” 

John’s ability to simultaneously prioritize Francesca’s desires while making sure she knows she is “just right” with or without orgasm is total green flag behavior across the board.

Unfortunately for Francesca — but fortunately for us — modern women have more tools at our disposal. Though Francesca won’t have expert guidance to help her achieve her pinnacle, with her new support system, the world is collectively crossing its fingers that she finally gets her O when part two of Season 4 drops on Feb. 26.

Ginger Koehler is an editorial Intern at Her Campus. She writes for the Wellness section, mostly covering sex and relationships, and occasionally branching out to other sections.

Ginger is a student at the University of Florida. Her majors are Journalism and Theories and Politics of Sexuality, with specializations in women’s studies and magazines. Beyond Her Campus, Ginger has worked as a sex columnist for four other publications. When she’s not writing, Ginger is hosting sex education workshops for her peers at UF.

Friends compare Ginger to Carrie Bradshaw, but she fancies herself as more of a Samantha. In her free time, Ginger enjoys taking hip-hop fitness classes and reading cheesy fantasy novels.

She is liable to talk explicitly about sexual health to anyone who will listen. Her favorite self-care activity is doing unspeakable things to people she doesn’t like on The Sims 4.