Do you ever find yourself shrugging your shoulders and settling on the “boys will be boys” conclusion? Real Live College Guy Andy is here to show you that mature men do (in fact) exist. He has an uncanny ability to sort out the good guys from the bad apples and is here to bring you the best in college love advice.
I’m a pretty shy girl. So, I’ve always held on to this idea of a Prince Charming in shining armor to come rescue me from the bubble I’ve placed myself in. My question is do guys even give the time of day to girls who are shy or is it a lost cause and I should just put on armor and try and save myself? – Shy Girl at Syracuse
I hate to break it to you, but life is not like a Disney movie. Now I don’t know what has made you so shy or what experience you do have in the dating world, but it definitely sounds like you have to put yourself out there more.
That said, doing so shouldn’t be a bigger deal than it actually is. Just get involved with your school, answer questions in class, join clubs, hang out in the quad, go to school performances, games, anything that will get you out and mingling with people!
Most of us get shy at times. Nobody is fully comfortable in all social situations but it is important to not overwhelm yourself. Take baby steps and just focus on meeting people and making friends. By joining and getting thoroughly involved in a club, you will start to grow out of your comfort zone.
It would be bad advice to tell you just to walk up to a cute guy at a bar and try to start a conversation. That’s a tall order even for the girls who don’t consider themselves especially shy. But by getting involved, you may meet a guy who seems non-threatening and meet him as a friend first. Down the line, maybe it will develop into something more.
When it comes to being shy around guys, well, just break it down. I have to assume you have platonic male friends whom you aren’t shy around. Why aren’t you shy around them? Maybe start by figuring that out and then maybe go after similar types of guys. And a friends-first approach is never a bad idea when it comes to relationships.