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Sex + Relationships

Real Live College Guy: Am I Totally Misreading This Text?

We all need a little guidance now and then, so whether you’re stressed about a fling gone wrong, a recently wrecked relationship or how to handle a stage-five clinger, Real Live College Guy Jon is here to help you navigate the college dating scene.

This guy and I are friends; both of us are in relationships. We text often, but one time I was a bit surprised and puzzled by his answer. I was teasing him about forgetting my drink, so when he offered to buy me coffee I told him, “No thanks, it’s complicated.” Anyway we joked about it until I told him it’s a tall, extra hot, nonfat latte. He replied saying, “Stop, I am getting all excited here.” Was that just teasing or flirting? We flirt, but nothing out of line. Let me know what you think. – Confused

Confused,

That is impossible to tell exactly what he meant. As we all know when texting, a sender’s message can often be taken for a totally different meaning by the receiver. 

I am not sure if you intended for that coffee order to read as flirty but I got a good chuckle out of how he may have interpreted it.

As two friends in separate relationships, I would suggest you reiterate that you want to stay friends but nothing more. If one of you thinks otherwise a lot of problems could arise. With that being said it is perfectly fine to joke and keep a healthy platonic relationship outside of your significant other!

Misunderstanding a text is very common and understandable. It is one of the faults of our tech-driven society. Most of the emotion or meaning of the message can be lost in the interpretation of the text. I cannot stress my advocacy for talking in person or over the phone — at least occasionally to better understand a conversation. 

-Jon

 

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Jon is currently a senior at the University of Rhode Island double majoring in physics and biology with an intent of going to medical school.  He also spent two semesters at in exchange program at California Polytechnic University. Growing up in Rhode Island he loves being on the water and the bay is his second home. Spearfishing and freediving are two of his favorite hobbies.   Follow him @RIBORNRIBRED on Instagram. 
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