Online dating can be just as tricky and awkward as going on a first date. Although online dating eliminates the face-to-face conversation, it still generates the same feelings from its participants. You still feel the same anxiety about initiating an intelligent conversation with someone you don’t know, the same butterflies flutter through your stomach when all seems to be going well, and, sadly, the date can end abruptly if someone says the wrong thing. On top of that, you’re never 100 percent sure that the person you’re flirting with online is being genuine. That’s why I’ve always admired people who try online dating. It takes guts to put oneself out there in such a public way and try to find a connection with a total stranger. It’s risky, but often times it ends up going well.
I’ve entertained the idea of online dating, but ultimately I’ve been too shy to commit to creating a profile of myself and searching for someone special on a dating site or app like Tinder. Not to mention I’ve heard too many negative things and seen enough rude messages sent to friends to even consider joining Tinder. But then, I thought, what if I tried it out for fun? Instead of taking Tinder seriously and attempt to find Mr. Right Now, I could try it for a month, use it to prank a few guys and make a fool of myself. So, on a whim, I decided to create a Tinder profile. Then, to make things interesting, I tried to respond to the messages I received with romantic comedy movie quotes as often as possible.
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When I first started Tinder, I fully expected to be messaged by some immature, bad-mannered frat boys who were only interested in finding someone to hook up with. From what I’d heard, that was the main reason people used Tinder. But, the first couple of matches who messaged me seemed nice. They really tried to initiate a genuine conversation with me.
I initially started using ‘subtle’ rom-com quotes that weren’t too random, like “As you wish” from The Princess Bride (see above), and most of those were not acknowledged by the other guy. The best example is this guy, Jason, who was incidentally my first ‘match’ on Tinder. He seemed really nice but was so oblivious to what I was doing that he inadvertently made it easier for me to insert relevant rom-com quotes to the conversation. But, he raised my expectations of the types of guys I would be encountering on Tinder over the next month.
The second message I sent here was a quote from the movie Hitch.
I complimented his dedication to kids with a quote from Mean Girls.
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Once I got the feel of Tinder, I tried to be more daring and kooky with my responses. I wanted to get bigger reactions out of the guys who messaged me. Every time I was notified that I got a response to one of my bizarre rom-com quotes, I felt a rush of both adrenaline and anxiety; there was no telling how any of these guys would respond to me. But, surprisingly, a lot of guys I talked to were pretty chill. They didn’t identify the films these quotes were pulled from, nor did they make fun of me; they just went with it. I couldn’t tell if they were simply laid-back and didn’t mind the quotes, if they hated them but they pretended not to so they could push their own agenda, or if they just weren’t familiar with too many romantic comedies.
The first quote is from Never Been Kissed and the second is from Up (I know, not a typical rom-com, but it has its romantic moments).
This guy never caught on to my Easy A quotes.
He was amused by this line from Mean Girls.
I couldn’t resist using this great quote from She’s the Man.
I started to think that maybe I was really quick to judge Tinder and the people who use it. I realized that many of the men I talked to did not embody the frat boy stereotype I had envisioned and that Tinder was meant for more than just finding someone to hook up with. Additionally, I realized that maybe you don’t have to be so careful and nervous when you start a conversation with someone online; just be yourself and if that other person is genuinely interested in getting to know you, then they’ll respond well.
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I mean I sent most of the Tinder matches the weirdest, most random messages (some of which didn’t even make sense) and they didn’t freak out.
Another classic Mean Girls quote:
…Or maybe I spoke too soon.
Either way, I didn’t talk to any of my matches for very long. I continued to message rom-com quotes to each ‘match’ until I got a funny reaction out of them, and then left it at that. And judging by the fact that only a couple of them tried to message me again, I’d say they were fine with that. In truth, the only guys who said hi to me again after some time had passed were those who received the ‘subtle’ movie quotes from me. Again, I’m not entirely sure how to read that: did I scare them away with my quirkiness, or did they realize that I wasn’t looking for a casual hook-up?
With all its ups and downs, Tinder is still different from what I expected. Not only did I get a decent amount of messages from matches, but I got over 400 ‘likes’ in a few weeks, much more than I anticipated. Being acknowledged in such a way was oddly flattering, yet it wasn’t enough for me to keep my Tinder profile and give it a serious shot in the future. With all experiments, one must draw a conclusion from their research. Personally, I can say that I only took away two real conclusions from this fun little experiment: 1) Tinder is not for me and 2) not enough men have seen Mean Girls.