So I know most of you are super curious as to why I would still be friends with my ex, and not just like regular friends; he is one of my best friends. Here’s the backstory: He and I dated for about a year and a half before we broke up. We met in his sophomore year of high school and my junior year. We didn’t go out right away, instead we became friends first. In fact, we became best friends and I didn’t realize that I had fallen in love with him until months later and I was worried that he didn’t feel the same way about me, that I might tell him and he’d freak out and we’d no longer be friends. Turns out that wasn’t the case. He felt the same way that I did and we became #couplegoals for the rest of my junior and the entirety of my senior year.
After a year and half, he and I broke up for several reasons. He was going to be a senior in my first year of college and we were putting over 600 miles between us. I knew what I needed to do to make sure that I wasn’t going to be too homesick or attached to the people back home. I needed to go out and be me and not worry about trying to make anything work with anyone else. The surprising thing that happened was that he understood and our break up was mutual. No screaming or epic fights and no hard feelings. Though after I broke up with him I spent hours crying because I knew that the decision I was making was right for me but it still hurt.
So I moved halfway across the country for my dream school and he stayed behind and began his senior year. Now, we didn’t talk to each other for four months and you’d think that in that time that we’d lose the friendship that we had developed over the past three years but that wasn’t the case. Sure we didn’t talk that much in the beginning and it was awkward and slightly uncomfortable but I know that I could still text him about the “important stuff” in my life. Like how it was chicken tortilla soup day at the caf, or that I still hadn’t picked my major, or to not take Philosophy because it was so hard. In return, he kept me updated on his life. I know that I was one of first people that he told about his acceptance to his dream school.
Now this is where most people tell me one of two things: One, that if our breakup was this easy and we became friends again this quickly than we probably never really loved each other in the first place. Those people are wrong. I did really love him and the foundation of our friendship to relationship is why we get along still. It’s also why our friend group didn’t have to decide between him or I. Two, that we never really stopped loving each other. I never said that I stopped loving him. But right now I shouldn’t be his girlfriend, our lives are changing still. Next year he’s going to college and is going to have to deal with all the things that I had to deal with this year. I don’t know what’ll come, but I know that no matter what happens we’ll have each other’s backs.
For me, what I need from him is for him to still support me through my life like I support him. We talked about it before I left and I know that he will stand by me no matter what. We may not be together anymore but we are best friends and best friends are supposed to support each other no matter what. This is our “no matter what” and as of right now I think we’re doing a pretty good job.
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