Some may think that when you are alone you are automatically lonely, but that isn’t always the case. Sometimes people are alone because they just moved to a new school or they just got in a fight with their friends. There are learned habits that can help a person learn to feel company within themselves without needing other people. For some people, making friends is hard, while for others they don’t have the social skills or the social battery to always spend time with people, and that is okay. My mom always told me that the strongest person in your life should be yourself.Â
Where Do You Start?
Start by doing things that you enjoy, like going out on walks, going on a drive or getting your favorite drink. Do anything that gives you joy for that given day, even if it is small. It doesn’t always have to be spending money, just something that you enjoy. Even if others think it is abnormal, that is okay; if it brings you joy, that is what matters. If you are a student, one of the best things to do is to do your schoolwork outside of your room. Go to a coffee shop or a bench outside; little things like that can make you feel so productive for the day, and you are surrounded by other people without necessarily interacting with them.
Getting Out of Your Own Head
Sometimes the hardest part is you telling yourself that you are lonely. In the beginning, it may feel that way, especially if you just made a big move and you may not have made friends, or you just got in a fight with your friends. Sometimes you have to think that I am not the only person who is going through this. There are thousands of other people feeling the same way I am at this same moment. Remind yourself that you have yourself, and that’s some of the best support you can have. Acknowledging your feelings is hard, but it is a huge step in making a difference in how you feel.
Companions Who Aren’t HumanÂ
Some people get pets when they live alone or feel alone to fill the void; sometimes a pet fish is enough to fill it. Having something in your room when you are ready to go to bed is enough to just make you feel like you aren’t always alone. Another remedy is getting a weighted stuffed animal or weighted blanket. While they don’t have to be weighted, some people find the weight to be comforting.Â
Things Not to DoÂ
Now, some things not to do are sitting in your room all day in bed, by sitting in bed all day you are reminding yourself that you are alone and have nothing to do. That is not something that you want to do, speaking from experience. It is proven that you get worse feelings of sadness and anxiety when you lie down, so get up. Go on a walk, go to the gym or maybe even go for a swim; the more you get out, the better you feel.Â
The moral of the story is: get up every day, be active and do what makes you happy and you will make yourself your best friend. You can either be your best friend or your biggest enemy. You can fill the void of being lonely by your own actions. Remember, it is ok to feel lonely sometimes; it’s a normal human feeling, but don’t become consumed by it. Â
References:
Pires, J. S., & Pires, J. S. (2026, May 21). Why does my anxiety get worse at night? Birch Grove Mental Health. https://birchgrovementalhealth.com/why-anxiety-gets-worse-at-night/