Everyone who knows me knows how much I hate Valentine’s Day. Not because I am lonely or heartbroken, but because I think the holiday is unnecessary and often harmful. Valentine’s Day puts pressure on people to prove their love on a single date, turning affection into something performative instead of genuine.
I also dislike the way Valentine’s Day affects mental health. For single people, the holiday can feel isolating. For those in relationships, it can create the idea that love only needs to be shown on special occasions because society expects it. Love should not feel scheduled or forced.
In my experience, real love is built through consistency. Healthy relationships thrive on everyday effort, communication and emotional presence, not on one overpriced dinner or bouquet once a year.
With that being said, here are ways to show love outside of Valentine’s Day.
Give flowers on random days
Flowers should not be reserved for anniversaries or holidays. Picking up a bouquet on a normal Tuesday or bringing one home after a long week shows thoughtfulness without obligation. The gesture feels more meaningful when it is unexpected.
Be present in everyday moments
Love shows up in attention. Put the phone down, listen fully and check in without being prompted. Small actions like remembering important dates, asking how their day went or simply sitting together matter more than grand gestures.
Express appreciation often
Do not wait for a special occasion to say thank you or to offer a compliment. Let your partner know they are appreciated for who they are and what they do. Feeling valued on a regular basis strengthens emotional connection.
Show up when it is inconvenient
Being there during stressful periods or difficult conversations matters more than showing up when things are easy. Emotional availability and reliability build trust and security in a relationship.
Learn how your partner receives love
Everyone feels loved differently. Some people value quality time, while others appreciate words of affirmation or acts of service. Making the effort to understand and meet those needs shows care and emotional maturity.
Create meaning without a calendar
Shared routines and small traditions can be just as special as holidays. Weekly coffee dates, late-night drives or spontaneous plans create memories that are rooted in connection, not obligation.
Extend love beyond romance
Love is not limited to romantic relationships. Showing up for friends, checking in on family members and practicing self-care are all valid expressions of love that deserve just as much attention.
Love should not be confined to one day in February. When affection is shown consistently and intentionally, relationships feel healthier, more secure and more meaningful. Love deserves to be expressed every day, not just on special occasions.