Perfect. This is how I describe the person I once fell in love with. It’s hard to sit here and put into words what I can only describe in feelings but words will have to suffice in order to describe her. To start off, I met this person almost a year ago during practices for a student-run culture night show. In a room packed with people, we happened to sit next to each other and bond over a simple, yet complex, energy bar that she was fond of. To me, it was a late evening snack. To her it meant more. This connection created over a bar bloomed in the next couple of days as we began to talk frequently. Online chat, text messages, random walks together, something was growing; I just did not know what. It has been one year since I asked her out one chilly night in SWEM library. In this year, I have learned more about this person than I thought I’d ever know about someone else. Love was something unfamiliar to me, but as Rihanna put it, I found it in a hopeless place. Here I describe every man’s want in a significant other, someone who is more a lady than the girls you’ve met but can still kick it back and be every guy’s gal.
Where we go, our music follows. The day of our show, she and I took a drive in my car to Bloom to pick up libations for the after-party. As we drove there, I find out that she loved the same songs that I do; her taste in music is nothing that I’ve ever heard before. She is the only person who has as large a collection of songs as I do AND who actually shuffles through each one, one hundred and sixty gigabytes, and counting. No matter what day, what hour, what minute, the song she’s playing reflects how she is feeling at the moment or what emotion she wishes to express. And I’m the only one who knows that. She doesn’t rely on one genre either; her taste is as eclectic as mine. From Rock to Rap, Electric to Country, she matches me perfectly. I don’t know where I’d be in my life without music. With this, I find solace every time I hear her singing along to a song playing loudly from her bedroom speakers. Music is intangible since it never needs to be cleaned, updated, or cared for. But she gives as much care to her music as she would a material belonging.
[pagebreak]
She’s a romantic in every sense. She’s not like other girls who care for jewelry, money, presents, and fancy clothes. She is a woman of simplicity, one that takes pleasure in the little things in life. How do I know? She tells me. She finds happiness in the smallest of things: a clean sink, a beautiful sunset, a good dessert. A person who isn’t afraid to express her own, the way she is feeling, the mood she is in, is hard to find. Instead of a fancy dinner, I asked her to be my girlfriend over an extra-large bag of kettle cooked chips, her favorite dish in the whole world. Instead of jewelry for her birthday, I made her a personalized photo collage of the few months we were together. Instead of a teddy bear that is the same size as she, she’d rather have a small one with more significance, more value. Memories are the fuel for the car she calls experience. She gave me more than enough to keep my car running for decades to come; I hope we drive in the same lane again one day.
She is the strongest woman I know, besides my own mother, not only in the physical sense, but also in the emotional sense. She grew up without much guidance and was an only child. Her parents’ relationship fell apart with the divorce destroying her. Her life has been an emotional rollercoaster of ups and downs yet she still maintains some semblance of normalcy. Nothing is perfect, life isn’t perfect, and she understands that. If there is one word I can use to describe her, it’s resilient, a word I use to describe myself every time. Physically, she works out constantly. I chastise her for it, in a joking manner, but I respect her even more for doing so. She’s not the girl you see on the elliptical reading a magazine but rather, the one who is doing pushups in the corner, lifting heavier free weights than you can, and doing enough pull-ups to embarrass any ordinary guy. This is the girl whose favorite possession, less workout gear, is the Iron Gym pull-up bar I gave her. Oh yea, she’s also vegetarian. Who else do you know of who can juggle 18 credits, support her friends, find happiness in her day, and still find time to live a healthy lifestyle? The answer is: no one.
[pagebreak]
At this point, read “guys”, you’re probably wondering how she looks. Imagine the most beautiful person you have ever seen. Now, double that beauty. Yet, this is not just the beauty that commands the attention of strangers, it is the beauty that is too good for runway models. To start, her smile can warm your heart on an icy, bitter cold day. Her eyes make you forget all the wrong in the world. Her hair wraps around you when you put your arms around her. Some of my best memories include lying next to her in the morning and watching the sunrays dance on our fingers. Sometimes I think the sun gets so jealous that she spends time dancing with night that it patiently waits outside her window to peek in and frolic with her come morning. She puts on two different personas during the year’s seasons: pale-skinned during the fall and winter and dark tanned during spring and summer. Appearance-wise, she is very well put together. Her closet is as eclectic as her taste in music is. Even with exhaustion and lack of time, she still manages to express her prep-chic look. Although her physical beauty is not what I fell in love with, she is the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on.
She is one in a million. She can be with anyone in the world but wants to spend time with me, wants to care for me, wants to be mine, and only mine. Good things just happen to me when I’m around her; she is my good luck charm. Daylight appears brighter, music sounds clearer, food tastes better, and my heart beats faster; all for her.
* * *
Don’t get me wrong; although I start with perfect, no relationship maintains this state. Impurities are destined to occur. But these impurities help make a relationship stronger. Don’t ever lose someone that loves you unconditionally. Don’t ever hurt someone who takes you for who you are. We all makes mistakes, do wrongs that can’t be unwritten. But when life becomes worth living, sadness becomes happiness, and pain turns to joy, you have finally found love in a hopeless place. Find your love, hold onto it, and never let it go. My last words are for her:
“I hope someday you read this and are able to see how much I love and care about you. Forever in my mind you are incised and forever that inscription will remain.”