A butterfly can’t see its wings
Usually during my nightly TikTok doom scroll, I’m bombarded with clips of toddlers dropping F-bombs, puppets lip-syncing to GloRilla and the occasional “white boy of the month” edit. Rarely does my algorithm provide me anything with substance—let alone something that sticks with me. But last week, it did.
A video appeared, layered with clips of conventionally attractive women sharing “glow up” tips—which really just meant how to get skinnier, prettier and more desirable. How to fit the mold. Then the screen shifted: quiet scenes of nature—mountains, rivers, trees swaying in the wind—paired with the phrase, “Humans saw this and let society define beauty.” But what hit me hardest wasn’t the imagery. It was the caption: “You. Were. Never. Meant. To. See. Your. Face.”
I saved this TikTok to my favorites, and every time I watched it, the words felt more powerful. It’s not something we often stop to consider, but the reality is that humans weren’t created alongside makeup, skincare or fleeting trends, yet these things weigh so heavily on how we judge one another. Our ancestors didn’t even know what a mirror was, so it’s clear that the values we hold today are not the same ones they used to measure worth.
It is wholly unnatural to see our reflections so clearly in a mirror, where we are reduced to critique and compare every aspect of our appearance. We were meant to see ourselves in the reflections of water, bent and distorted at nature’s will. In paintings to see how others convey our spirit through art. In poems and letters—words used to describe unfiltered emotions our presence evokes. All of these things are entirely subjective, but pretty all the same. We were meant not to compare but to appreciate the beauty of others in all of their differences—to see a myriad of people and embrace them all based on merit, void of societal standards of beauty.
Beauty, in its essence, is a subjective concept. Defined as “a combination of qualities, such as shape, color, or form, that pleases the aesthetic senses, especially sight,” its meaning is clear. However, my interpretation is simple: beauty pleases everyone and no one all at once. It’s impossible to foresee what will captivate one person or repulse another, and this unpredictability only deepens its allure. Before the cookie-cutter standards that social media has so kindly imposed on us, people formed connections based on the content of the soul, not the measurements of the body.
The mirror is both a gift and a burden. It shows us what the world sees, but not what truly matters. For some, it offers affirmation; for others, it becomes a silent critic, distorting self-worth with every glance. But remember this: a butterfly, regardless of its elegance, has never seen its own wings.
You may never fully grasp the beauty you carry—inside or out—but those around you do. So when you find yourself staring too long at your reflection, searching for flaws, pause. Let that moment remind you that your value was never meant to be measured in symmetry or surface. You were meant to be felt, not just seen.