Trigger warning: This post contains talk about sexual assault.
During the Brett Kavanaugh Supreme Court confirmation, many women felt compelled to share their stories about why they never reported their sexual assault. The #WhyIDidntReport movement swept the nation after Trump posted on Twitter asking why the women who accused Kavanaugh didn’t just come forward and report the incident when it occurred. Many women took to Twitter to explain why they couldn’t come forward. Some of the reasons included fear of the abuser, fear of not being believed and not wanting to be ridiculed by their family or friends. This movement is empowering and necessary; because of this, I’ve decided to share my story as to #WhyIDidntReport.
My boyfriend of three years sexually assaulted me on various occasions. Every time he did, I was left confused and broken; how could the man I loved violate my body? I always thought it would be easier if it were a stranger who had assaulted me because that way I had no connection to him. Throughout my time in the relationship, I never dared to tell people what was happening to me since I never thought they would believe me — after all, I was dating him. I was ashamed. I didn’t want my parents to know I was dating my assaulter; I was scared that people wouldn’t believe me and I didn’t want people to think he was a bad guy. I was taught that my body was for the pleasure of men and I was confused because I believed that others felt that my body was my boyfriend’s property. This is #WhyIDidntReport.
Like many women, my story isn’t unique. Sadly, our society makes it difficult for women to feel supported and comfortable reporting their assault. What one can do is believe someone if they disclose an assault and give them a safe space to explain their situation. These women who come forward about their assaults are heroic and brave. Let’s stand up to sexual assault and create an environment where victims can openly come forward about their stories and feel supported.
If you or someone you love has been affected by sexual violence, check out these resources:
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
UHS The Rape Crisis Center Hotline: 608-251-7273
UHS Violence Prevention & Survivor Services: 608-265-5600 (Option 3)