The past month here in Madison has flown by at a terrifying rate. The stress of those last exams and papers of the semester, and the unforgettable (even though I may not fully remember) nights out with amazing friends has combined into a blur of that which is college; the best and fastest four years of one’s life. Although I feel like I haven’t had the time to take a breath lately, I’ve realized that I can’t let life rush past me. Sometimes a woman needs to lose control over a few aspects of her life and just let it happen.
I’ve considered many different parts of my life when thinking about how fast time flies, one of them being boys and love. I’ve come to the conclusion that the male species frightens me. My past relationships were, well, less than great. They were basically a combination of some of the happiest times of my life… along with the cheating, lying, ignoring, and everything else that makes up a crappy relationship. In order to save myself from being sad or angry my logic was that if I flew solo, no one could get close enough to hurt me. How stupid am I?! I’ve assumed the worst out of guys whose intentions were most likely good based on a few guys that I’ve known in my past. That’s MY issue. Not theirs
I’m lucky enough to have some of my best friends from high school here with me as fellow badgers. These girls have known me for the majority of my life, and know my ups and downs with boys. With their help I’ve realized my main problem. My “type” sucks. Throughout high school I was always attracted to the guys who thought way too highly of themselves. These egomaniacs would always be the life of the party, or the star athlete whose proudest moment in life will probably be winning state. These guys got my heart beating fast, but broke it even faster. The problem with them is that they are too self-absorbed to have the full capacity of caring about someone else. Their interests always go before others’, and they know you’ll always be there because they’re so irresistible.
It’s time to break out of that cycle. A few weeks ago one of my friends introduced me to a guy at a party. He was nice, funny, and surprisingly respectful given the amount of…umm… soda… at this party. After we left we all hung out for a while back in the dorms, and I could tell he was into me. The only problem? SO NOT MY TYPE. He’s mostly everything that I don’t go for in a guy, and that really freaked me out. After some convincing from my girls, I’ve decided to go with the flow on this one and give him a chance. It is far too early to tell where this one is going to go, and quite frankly I just don’t care. I’m just having fun. Don’t you worry though; single girl is definitely still single.