Wednesday was Earth Day, a day dedicated to celebrating that floating ball in space we call home. In honor of this commemorative day, I pledged to do my part to help keep Mother earth and all her beauty safe.
Written with one arm around a tree.
Mother Earth, today is all about you girl and you only. Turn up that “I’m the center of the universe” attitude, and let’s focus on you. Here are the ways I vow to do my part:
1. Hug a tree, because trees like moving slow, and I respect that.
2. Refrain from cranking the AC (unless of course the “AC” is followed by “DC”)
3. Use as little energy as possible, including foregoing the energy it takes to leave my bed.
4. Reduce my dependence on oil, starting with Moroccan oil.
5. Release my four pet rats into the wild to fulfill their destiny as “nature’s garbage disposal.”
6. Lead the people in a drip-dry initiative (the Charmin’ bears will be grateful later).
7. Recycle paper, starting with the bills crampin’ my mailbox’s style.
8. Utilize every plant/earth-related emoji in my toolbox and not rest until all media accounts make it clear today—not sure that you heard—is Earth Day.
9. Average one earth emoji every six texts.
10. Make a Pinterest board “revolving” around Earth Day.
11. Properly mourn the loss of an apartment plant lost to the alcohol spill of Saturday night.
12. Sleep with the window open and the melodic shouts and woos of the drunken instead of running my fan.
13. Join a local soccer mom carpool to get around.
14. Finally go without my 75,000 watt One Direction nightlight.
15. Rally for the return of the decomposable Sun Chips bag (noise and all).
And finally, blast Michael Jackson’s “Earth Song” in your honor so you can do a little shake n’ quake to your fav song. Just doing my part—are you?