From the Girl Who Feels Bad For Saying No

Let’s face it: being busy is “trending” in our generation right now. We pride ourselves on the fact that we go to school full-time, work part-time, are a part of four social orgs, and on top of that, we still have a vibrant social life! While all of this may make you feel superior to those who appear less busy, this simply is not doable all the time. In fact, it’s rather unhealthy. When we fill our tiny open slots of time with more activity, more hustle and more tasks, we lose time and space to dwell. To idle. To re-boot. To reflect. To recharge... and in the midst of all that, we lose something very important; we lose ourselves. 

Now I am not saying the hustle is bad. As a girl studying entrepreneurship, I will confidently say the grind is good, and it is necessary to get ahead. However, there IS such a thing as TOO much hustle, and that’s where the problem lays. The problem is that we exert ourselves, our talent and our time, into too many places at the same time. We love the opportunity, and we don’t want to say no. Because, if we are being completely honest with ourselves, we like the fact that we can crunch a lot of words into a paper in only a few short hours. We love the fact that we are a leader and were selected as the president of our org. We love the fact that we can make our friends laugh, and they desire to spend time with us. We are hardwired for connection and therefore, we love that we are desired by our peers and the ones surrounding us. But please listen to what I am going to say next; You will get tired. You will eventually burn out if you don’t create time to just dwell. As much as we are designed to feel connected, we are also equally designed to need rest. Just look at how much sleep your body needs! It seems silly for us to neglect our basic physical needs in order to compete in this unrealistic marathon race our generation is running. In reality, we will all burn out at some point, so it’s important to start saying no today.  Rest. It’s something our physical body needs. But, it is also something our mind needs. I truly believe our society has it backward when it comes to rest. No, resting does not make you lazy. It can actually be a very intentional and necessary time. It does not mean you simply sit and watch Netflix all day. As great as that is, you aren’t truly resting. Your mind is still being consumed by some other numbing-entertainment. Rest is a time you can take to reflect in order to make a better decision the next time. It’s a time to recharge so you can take on the next task with full determination. It’s a time to just idle and simply be. And in order for you to spend time intentionally resting, you will need to say no to some things. 

Saying no is a huge struggle of mine, and I am still learning how to own it and embrace it. It makes you feel inferior because our generation and society has so harshly criticized needing rest. However, it is essential and important to start practicing now. Saying no will mean saying yes to self-growth through reflecting, recharging and resting.

 Saying no may allow you to say the best yes.