For those of you who aren’t basketball fans and are completely oblivious to the world of college sports, welcome to March Madness. No, March Madness is not St. Patrick’s Day. And no, it’s not code for Spring Break either, although the term could accurately describe a week in Panama City Beach or Cancun. March Madness is actually the time of the year where 68 college basketball teams duel it out to be the best Division I team in the NCAA—a.k.a March Madness equals bracket time where people from around the country predict the winners of the tournament, most likely betting money…or a case of Natty Light.
As we head into the Sweet 16, which type of girl are you when it comes to choosing the winners?
1. The Color Queen: When deciding between two teams you immediately check their colors because…duh. Florida might be seeded number one but blue and orange do not match so clearly they can’t win in your book. You take dressing for success a little too literally and think the only reason guys actually fill out their brackets based on the teams’ stats is because they’re color blind.
2. The Die-Hard Fan: There’s nothing, absolutely nothing, that will keep you from believing in your school’s team. Despite your school’s ranking, you have complete faith they will win it all because you are that big of a fan. For you, it’s pretty easy to pick the winners and losers. Your team always wins, your biggest rivals lose the first round, and everyone else you could care less about because frankly they’re not that cool. Sorry bout it.
3. The Stockbroker: More like “stalk” broker. You check every team’s stats more than the bankers of Wall Street check the Dow Jones to make sure you strategically pick your victors. You are determined to win and are convinced the numbers tell all.
4. The Fairy Godmother: Who doesn’t love a good fairytale? You always pick the underdog in hopes for another Cinderella story. Or maybe you just like upsets? Unclear.
5. The Mascot Guru: Similar to the Color Queen, you judge teams solely on their mascot. Any team who has a cute animal such as a dolphin or cute rodent has your vote. Looks like Stanford is out of the mix. Who has a tree as a mascot?! Oh excuse me their mascot is actually cardinal, like the color, not the bird. And to that you say “DEUCES.”
6. The Manipulator: There are many ways to take on this role. The first one being you fill out your bracket as you go without anyone knowing so you miraculously get every single prediction right and take home the prize for yourself. Or maybe you make your own bracket competition and dub yourself the winner despite not actually filling one out for yourself.
7. The Flirt: You use filling out brackets as an opportunity to talk to all of your cute guy friends. It’s perfect! You have an excuse to talk to them and you get their help in picking the right teams so you might actually have a shot at taking it all. It’s a win-win.
8. The Actual Sporty Spice: You actually understand and like basketball so you fill out your brackets each year with no problem. You know the best and the worst of each of the teams and go from there. March Madness is much more than a bracket for you. It’s about the sweat, the tears…you get the point.
No matter how you fill out your bracket, I wish you the best of luck in your predictions. Good luck out there, collegiates.