So, you’re looking for dating advice?
Dating can be a doozy. Let’s talk about it.
Pretty much anyone who starts anything has a moment in their life where they think, “If only I’d known about this before I started.” It’s inevitable! We’re not all natural-born experts, and we learn new things as we go forward in whatever journey we’re on. Dating is no exception. It has its learning curves too! A lot of us can walk into it feeling super clueless. That said, it doesn’t mean that those of us who are knowledgeable can’t do for others what we wish someone would’ve done for us. We can pass along our know-how, wisdom, knowledge, manual, etc. etc. etc. to those who still need it. And so, I asked college students the big questions: What advice do you have to those who’ve never dated?
What do you wish you’d known?
And here’s what they said:
Communication is SO important!
Get to know your partner as a friend first before you date.
You don’t have to kiss the first person who let’s you, don’t just kiss someone “because they’re there”. Kiss them because you want to!
DON’T CHEAT, be loyal. If you can’t remain in a relationship without cheating, you shouldn’t get into one
Relationships aren’t always easy, they take work. Make sure you’re emotionally ready to let someone in like that.
Not every decision you make has to revolve around your partner or satisfying your partner. You matter too! Be considerate of their feelings if it affects them, but don’t yield your whole life to what another person wants.
Allow yourself time to grow and heal after a breakup before starting a new one. It’s okay to take time to take care of you.
You don’t have to be in one! It’s okay to be single, it’s okay to be by yourself.
Not everything has to be super serious or fast. Give your relationship room to blossom!
Don’t rush. Be patient, make sure this is what you want, with the person you want, in the time you want.
It’s okay to not find “The One” immediately. Don’t be be down if what you thought was a perfect relationship doesn’t end up being that. It’s all a part of the journey, and you’re learning as you go!
It’s okay to ask for help. Whether that help be advice, support, or you find yourself in a dangerous situation and need to get out- it is okay to ask for it. You don’t have to feel ashamed.
Don’t ignore the red flags! The red flags are real.
Don’t let anyone walk all over you! A relationship is made of balance, not one person being the puppet and the other the puppeteer.
And that’s what they wish they knew!
I hope if you were looking for some insight that this helped you out! Everyone’s journey is different so some of this advice might seem obvious to you, some might not apply at all, or some may be things you’d never considered for! Different things work for different people! The one sentiment that all of this advice carries that pretty much EVERYONE needs to remember is this: take care of yourself and others. Make sure you’re ready for a relationship. When you’re in one, watch how you’re treated, watch how you’re treating your partner. Ask yourself if this relationship is healthy and fulfilling for the both of you. No one should feel like they’re being dragged along on a ride they don’t want to be in or be kicked around for their partner’s pleasure.
So collegiettes, I leave you with this, what do you wish you knew before you started dating? Have you learned from past mistakes? Think about it and get back to me, k?