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All the Single Ladies: National Single’s Day

We all know what February 14th is. What you probably didn’t know is that February 15th is Singles Awareness Day. Ironically, this acronym spells SAD.


This year, SAD is on a Monday which means I need to physically go to class and do some money science (and it’s Annie’s 21st birthday!), so I’ve made the decision to celebrate this holiday on the 14th. Time’s fake anyways. 


Now if you read my other articles, I’m kind of a hopeless romantic. I’m also a pretty cynical lady. I like my Rom-Coms, and I liked Bridgerton (although I do have complaints, that’s for another article).


I’m also really tired of people yanking me around into different roles and type-casting me as their supporting character-turned love interest.


But this year is different for me. Normally to get people to like me, I have to shrink myself to be less, well, everything. However, I moved into another major this year, and these people actually like me. I made some Andrew Johnson memes, flexed my knowledge on weird things like proper seafood cooking techniques, and even told someone he was being an idiot and he could do better than how he was acting. And he agreed.


This is very new to me. I’m very used to being known as a know-it-all and a b*tch. I really appreciate these guys for accepting me into their little History Major Guy Club. I also really appreciate the invitations to go on, like, actual dates where their friends can see me. 


But for the 14th, I’m planning on spending time with myself. And I’d like to explain why.


Aside from the fact that Valentine’s Day is one of the most commercialized holidays we’ve ever come up with (behind modern Christmas, of course), I don’t really believe in it. 


Now to celebrate, I usually do Pal-entines. I sneak out of my room at midnight and tape some meme-inspired Valentine’s cards on my friends’ doors. I even tried to get together a couple of “parties.” Parties being a group of people coming to my room to drink sparkling juice and play board games. These have failed miserably every year I’ve tried them. Last year, I made plans to hang out with one of my pals because the others had long-term relationships to do dates with. Needless to say, she found a date and brought him unannounced to our girl’s night, and I had to be the third wheel at my own party. I’m still not really over that.


My entire life I’ve been doing Valentine’s things for everyone but myself. And I’m sick of it. So I decided I was just going to stick with the cutesy meme door decorations and spend the rest of the holiday with myself.


So, if you’re looking to have your own Megantine’s day, here is a breakdown of my plans so you can copy me and have a great time.


1. I’m waking up before 10.

“Why would you do that to yourself? Aren’t you a night owl” you might ask? Well, I’m not going to waste precious time sleeping through a holiday to avoid thinking about how alone I am. I’m going to eat breakfast and celebrate the quiet.


2. I’m making myself The Breakfast.

You know, the breakfast that the guy in the movies always makes the girl after they spend the night together for the first time. I’m talking eggs, bacon, maybe a bagel or some peanut butter sourdough toast, the sparkling cider (instead of a virgin mimosa that I’m very allergic to). The full thing. Maybe some strawberries with a chocolate drizzle, maybe a second  bottle glass of that sparkling apple juice. Treat yourself.


3. I’m going to read a book. 

A full book. The kind of book I never have time to read for more than twenty minutes. We’re reading the whole thing. Maybe some Agatha Christie, maybe a Jane Austen. I haven’t decided. But it’s getting read.


4. I’m going for a walk.

Don’t know where, don’t know when. Even if I did, I wouldn’t be putting it on the internet, so I suggest you don’t either. Barring the weather being below 30 degrees, I’m going out to see some ducks or something. Yes, there’s going to be couples there. Yes, they’re going to be gross. I really don’t care. We’re listening to some Taylor Swift and Lizzo, and we’re going to book it.


5. I’m going to put on my best outfit.

Personally, I’m going with a red sweater dress, but literally, any outfit (as long as it’s your favorite or something you haven’t had a chance to wear yet) will work. Pajamas, ballgown, ghostbusters jumpsuit––doesn’t matter. Wear that sh*t. Live that life. 


6. I’m going to watch as many movies as I can.

I never have time to sit down and watch more than one movie. Sometimes I can’t even sit down and watch one before some nonsense happens. I’m turning off my phone, locking my door, and putting every movie I’ve been wanting to watch, but never had time, on that computer screen, and I’m going to sit in a nest of blankets and pillows on my unfolded futon, and watch it.


7. I’m going to make myself some pasta.

Because I think couples and girl’s groups are going to be dominating the lounge, I’m using my microwave pasta cooker, and I’m going to sit back down in my nest and eat that pasta. 


8. I’m doing an entire spa day.

I’m getting out the juice (sparkling or the “good for you” V-8 stuff, either will work), and bring out the rest of those strawberries. I’m getting all nice and cozy, and then I’m going to do an intense spa day. The whole nine yards (minus the hot rocks and seaweed for legal and safety reasons), I’m doing the face mask, the collagen under eye things, the pedicure grinding stone thing, the fancy lotion I got for Christmas. I’m going to be the smoothest, softest person under the sun. Take that, babies. 


9. I’m going to bed at a reasonable hour.

I’ve got the whole “Winding Down Ritual” ready too. We’re gonna do some yoga stretches to counteract that lactic acid build-up from our walk earlier, wash and moisturize the face, brush the teeth extra good. Then we’re going to get into our super-soft clean PJs, get into our freshly changed sheets (and the bed is even going to be made). We’re going to drink ice water out of our fancy cups that we washed, and we’re going to read for twenty minutes (or until we get tired) and then we’re going to sleep.


I’ve been excited about this for weeks. It’s really the only day I’m not going to feel guilty for doing all of this. And I’m not letting anyone guilt me into doing what they want to do.


So if you’re lucky enough to be able to blow off school or work on the 15th, have at it. Do stuff you want to do, and only stuff you want to do. If you can’t, make Singles Day whenever you want it to be. 


Now, you might be thinking “Meg, this is an awfully selfish plan you have here. You aren’t even going to spend time with your friends?” And the answer is no. Now, personally, I have a problem with the word selfish. I spend so much of my life planning things for other people. I really enjoy doing that! I make Kahoots for Hall Council every week, I come up with events for Her Campus, I plan outings and events for my friends. These things are fun for me, and I appreciate every single one of you, so don’t take this the wrong way, but sometimes I need a break.


And some people really like to ruin our relationship over this. The second I stop doing things (things these people don’t even recognize I’m doing until I stop), people like to label me as selfish. And they try to guilt me into doing things I don’t want to do to make them feel better. 


And from the bottom of my heart, I’d like to say, F*ck That.


You’re living your life for you, and that’s what singles day is about. So pop some bottles (whatever kind you can legally have) and choose yourself.


As the Supreme TikTok Bimbo Chrissy Chlapecka likes to say:

I love you. Say it back.


Meg Chaffee is a junior at Winona State University studying History and Political Science. She hopes to teach high school social studies, because she wouldn’t be able to deal with her students eating smart glue during craft activities just because it has the word “smart” on it. She wrote a story on Watt-pad (during middle school, in an account she can no longer access) that received far too many votes for several awards, and no, she will not give you the name. In her free time she enjoys reading, writing, and watching The Good Place repeatedly on Netflix.
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