I had heard time and time again that you will lose touch with many of your high school friends soon after you leave for college.
And like many other naïve, blissful high school friends, oblivious to the struggles of long distance friendships, we decided we would be the exception to the rule, that nothing would break us apart, or if it did, we would act like nothing had changed when we got back together.
Sadly (and unsurprisingly) this was not the case.
I was one of the last of my friends to leave home because of Williams’ very late start date, so I was already disappointed with the lack of responses I was getting from friends when I asked each of them with the very excited text “How’s everything going?!”. Some replied with curt, polite replies and one didn’t even answer at all. It wasn’t until I arrived on campus that I understood the hectic schedule of freshman orientation. And after that, we were off to the races being hurdled into first semester.
So granted, there is not very much time at all to prioritize my old friends from back home when you are juggling DIII athletics, a full time student schedule, and trying to make new friends.
Every now and then I would send a text or snapchat to check in on a few select friends, but, embarrassingly, most of the time I wouldn’t have the time to reply back. I just wanted them to know I was thinking of them.
Eventually, I realized those friends who weren’t bothering to reach out to me, wouldn’t reply back to me, or only reached out to tell me about something new they did with a boy were not worthwhile of my time or concern. However, I do feel lucky to say that I have found one true friend through all of this, the one that cares about me just as much as she did in high school, who I have called at 2am to talk through my problems over FaceTime, who even if we don’t talk for a few weeks can pick off like no time has passed at all.
This is the friend that I love with all my heart and can’t imagine a time in my life without her.
So for those of you that are struggling to keep connections with each and every one of your former friends, know that you may feel sad right now, but you can find your true lifetime friends as well.
My tip is that you don’t need constant communication to stay in touch. Once a week or once every two weeks is fine enough for a few texts back and forth. If it feels like a struggle or a burden to keep in contact with someone, then it is probably not worth it, not everyone is meant to stay in your life forever. You want to surround yourself with people are supportive and positive influences, not people who you feel are just a necessity to talk to.
For all you fellow freshman, as you learn who you are and who you want to me, know that you are not obligated to bog yourself down with high school ghosts as it is crucial to surround yourself with people you can grow with and experience new life with.