Okay ladies, I’m going to tell you the secret to creating a culture that embraces female sexuality for everything that it is…come in real close…*whispers* it’s us. We are the secret. It’s up to us to make sure that our bodies are respected by educating those around us, including the generations after ours. For centuries, women’s bodies have been objectified and stigmatized to the point where anything sex-related is silenced and pushed under the rug. People have always been scared to talk about sex in an open and care-free way and that has set the precedent that it shouldn’t be talked about, period.
Well if anything, we should be talking about it more.
It shouldn’t be uncomfortable to talk about sex and sexuality. It is the most basic, natural, fundamental function of all mammals. It’s how you and I are here today – our parents had sex. And now, many of us have sex. Yes, it is (or it should be) pleasurable for everyone involved. Yes, sometimes it gets messy and makes people uncomfortable to talk about – but it’s natural.
Sex. Sex. Sex. Sex. Maybe if someone reads it enough times, it won’t make them uncomfortable anymore. Say it with me: SEX. Quite frankly, there are more uncomfortable things to talk about – things such as rape and sexual assault, which can be a product of NOT talking about sex and NOT educating people.
So, why is sex so difficult for people to talk about? It can be a sensitive topic, and from a young age it’s engrained in our minds that sex is bad and something we should abstain from for as long as possible. This means that when we’re young, we’re not receiving a proper education when it comes to sex and sexuality, which can lead to kids engaging in sexual activities before they even know what it is. Kids are curious and they’ll participate in what piques their curiosity. They need to be educated and informed on at least the most basic information – this will help them avoid negative interactions and keep them safe from people who may try to take advantage of their lack of knowledge. It’s important that we openly talk about sex as a society, because to not talk about it is to be ignorant about it.
Sexual engagement involves communicating with your partner(s) about wants and desires without feelings of shame or embarrassment. Sex is deeply personal and intimate and should be treated as such. To be sexually communicative with someone is to be completely vulnerable to that person and that means respecting each other’s feelings and words. If people are more comfortable talking about sex, they will likely begin to feel more in touch with their own bodies and sexuality, which is so important in a society like ours. We need to be able to talk about sex in casual conversation in order to make it feel normal; talk about it with your mom, with your doctor, with your partner(s), with your friends or with yourself in the mirror. Just talk about it.
As women, it’s our responsibility to make sure that we are heard and respected when it comes to things such as sex. We need to educate those around us and make it known that sex is normal, and it is nothing to be ashamed about. So go ahead! Go talk about it like it isn’t the big deal that everyone makes it out to be – because it isn’t. Get yours, girl!