For the past few weeks, social media platforms have been flooded with advertising for the latest installment of the Fifty Shades of Grey movie trilogy, set to be released on (you guessed it) Valentine’s Day. The previous film, which was also a Valentine’s Day release, made millions in the box office and drew in a massive audience. Here is my issue with this: Fifty Shades of Grey is not a f***ing Valentine’s Day movie.
The Fifty Shades series is not a series about love overcoming all. It is a movie about an abusive relationship. Sadly, it is not marketed as such. The film’s advertising team has worked extensively to brand the film as some form of alternative love story, depicting a clearly unhealthy relationship as something others should strive towards. People have been bombarded with images of Christian and Anastasia (the two main characters) in intimate and loving embraces, steamy movie trailers, and love songs in an attempt to draw them in to see this year’s Valentine’s Movie event. While on the surface the film may seem innocent enough, looks can be deceiving.
Throughout the first movie (and all the books), Christian spends the majority of the time controlling, manipulating, and pressuring Anastasia. He controls where she goes, where she works, what she wears, when she exercises, and even when she masturbates. This girl seriously can’t catch a break. Under normal circumstances, most normal people would say, “what the hell, this guy is controlling and insane,” then dump him and run. However, advertising for the series portrays this controlling nature as “romantic” and “thoughtful”. Christian is made out to be the ideal man: rich, caring, mysterious, and a little (or in this case, a lot) freaky in bed, teaching women to look for men who act similarly to him, which is a recipe for disaster. If you seek out a partner who behaves this way, you’re going to have a bad time.
Another reason why this movie is absolutely NOT a love film, is because it teaches women that you need to conform and submit if you want your dream guy to fall for you. Anastasia is constantly jumping through hoops to please Christian, bending over backwards to make herself into somebody he can love. This is a big no-no. Women should not have to change themselves and sacrifice their feelings in order to feel worthy of a partner, but unfortunately Fifty Shades of Grey makes it seem as though it has to be that way.
The biggest selling point for the Fifty Shades series is probably the steamy sex scenes (which, by the way, aren’t that great). Sure, it feels sort of taboo and risqué to go see a borderline pornographic film in theatres, and these sorts of films are in short supply, but trust me, the sex scenes are the farthest thing from accurate. If you’re into fake moans and about 30 seconds of sex where both parties miraculously finish at the same time, or widely misrepresented BDSM, this is the film for you! Not only does it paint an inaccurate picture of BDSM, it sets impossible standards for sex. Not everyone finishes in 30 seconds; in fact, almost no one finishes this quickly. Sex requires work, and it’s a hell of a lot more fun when both parties are comfortable and communicating with each other. If you want to watch people having sex on Valentine’s Day, I would suggest watching porn or doing it in front of a mirror, I 100% guarantee you’ll have a better time.
While whips and chains may be sexy, abusive relationships most certainly are not. Do yourself a favour this Valentine’s Day and opt for a movie with better morals, or skip the movie and get a little freaky in the bedroom yourself.