There have been so many instances where I have felt as though situations would be easier if I was a little more willing to input myself into conversations, ask a stranger where they got their outfit or apply for a job that I felt might be a little out-there for me. But my lack of confidence I had in myself and the shy part of me always took over. It came to me one day when I was at the gym and saw a girl in an amazing outfit. I wanted to ask her where she got it, but couldn’t get the nerve to talk to a complete stranger. What if I made a bucket list including all the things I wouldn’t do thanks to my shyness in an attempt to feel more confident in high-anxiety situations? Here is that list.
Compliment Strangers When You Like Their Outfits
I constantly see people with nice hair, outfits or accessories, yet I never say anything because approaching someone I don’t know seems daunting. But when I have been complimented by strangers, I think of that interaction in a positive way for days and weeks on end. So why not compliment strangers? Not only will it make their day, but you’d have spoken your mind and allowed yourself to leave your comfort zone of talking to people you don’t know. Making this a habit will allow it to get easier and easier.
Join a Club
In high school, I had never joined clubs, as my friends also didn’t, and I didn’t want to interact with people I didn’t know without the comfort of someone I did know present. In university, I decided not to let my fears get the best of me and joined Her Campus. I ended up falling in love with the club as well as the people within it. So this year, regardless of whether you’re in school or not, join a club, a workout class or something where you know nobody and make connections. It will be difficult at first, but you may find people you really connect with over things you’re passionate about.
Solo Dates
Going alone can be difficult for some, especially places you typically go to with others. But try it out, and you may find not only that you enjoy being alone but also that you enjoy the company of yourself. There is nothing more powerful than a person who can enjoy being alone. Go on walks, go to a coffee shop with a book, see a movie or take yourself out for dinner or dessert one day. Make it a weekly thing, just to have time to yourself. This will make being alone in public less daunting, and you may end up meeting people along the way.
“Yes” Challenge
When invited to social events, you may find yourself saying no because you’re worried about what interactions you may have to have. Challenge yourself to say yes more. You obviously don’t always have to do things you don’t want to do. But every so often, say yes and go for it. Maybe you’ll discover things you actually like doing and meet people you actually like talking to. When someone asks to make plans, don’t always jump to no. Consider what it’d be like to just try it.
Host A Small Gathering
You may feel more comfortable interacting in your own spaces. That being said, hosting an event in your own space may seem scary as you’re not able to leave the event early and hide away. Maybe try hosting an event with your close friends or even people you want to get to know better and open up your space to others. Being more inviting can reduce shyness and allow your social butterfly to come out.
Whether it be spending more time alone in public or reaching out to a person you barely know, going out of your comfort zone when you’re shy can be a difficult task. But it isn’t impossible. You may find that you enjoy and make friends by meeting strangers or joining a club. Allow this year to be your fearless year and embrace opportunities that may come from being a little less shy and a little more sure of yourself.