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The Stages of Falling for Your Best Friend: Recipe Form

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Wilfrid Laurier chapter.

As any cliché friends-to-lovers story would go, it always starts with you genuinely swearing to yourself that you would never date the other person and repeatedly telling everyone around you that your friendship is, in fact, completely platonic. Then for whatever reason, the universe and fate spontaneously decide to throw a recipe into your life and shake things up for the universe’s own reality TV entertainment where you get swept up in the stages of falling for your best friend. It’s a complicated situation to be in but the recipe is pretty standard for most people (with some ingredient adjustments depending on the chef).

Stage 1: A teaspoon of second impressions

Something changes and/or some sort of plot development happens where a shift in your friendship occurs – at least on your side. Maybe you’ve been spending a lot more time together and that’s when these new feelings start to stir up within you. Maybe he got a new haircut or wardrobe that made you see him in a totally new and different way. Or maybe deep down, there was always something brewing but you just needed a catalyst to make you realize it. No matter what your plot development is, something happened to make you question if what you thought was completely platonic on your side really is.

Stage 2: One too many tablespoons of double-takes

Suddenly, you’re noticing things that you never noticed before in the entirety of your friendship. At some point, the person you thought you’d never see yourself being with romantically somehow changed without you even noticing the transition. Now you can’t help but notice all the little things that you didn’t notice before. Before your feelings shifted, you didn’t notice the cute eyebrow quirk that would appear when he got super passionate about a certain opinion or topic. You also never noticed how gentle he was whenever you cried to him and how he always seemed to know the right thing to say to cheer you up or how defined his arms are. You’ll probably be doing one too many double-takes, baffled at how this person you’ve known for so long is somehow the same person they’ve always been, yet simultaneously brand new and different.

Stage 3: Five cups of fears and doubts

This stage is probably one that you’ll keep coming back to over and over again. You keep thinking of anything and everything that could possibly go wrong. And who can blame you when there is so much at stake? Even if there was a small chance of luck that they feel a fraction of what you feel for them, would taking that chance be worth the possibility of losing one of the most important people in your life forever? You overanalyze every aspect because you know that if you were to ever do anything, it would be one of the biggest gambles in your life. You could end up having everything you ever wanted in life or end up forever losing one of your best friends.

Stage 4: Season with a hundred daydreams

Even if it’s a tricky situation to navigate, it won’t stop you from daydreaming about the possibilities. You start to wonder, what would they be like as your boyfriend or girlfriend? You start to imagine the different places you could go to, and in your head, the idea of hanging out alone together now makes you feel all giddy and nervous at the same time. Suddenly you’re planning imaginary dates and milestones and you get lost in these cute thoughts as you two video-call each other. You might even take an hour in your busy day to just reminisce about a compliment he gave you earlier or take a deep breath to calm down your racing heart and mentally prepare yourself for your nightly call with them in eight hours.

Stage 5: Bake at a high temperature for maximum acceptance

Well, there’s no denying it, you’re falling for your best friend hard. You’ve analyzed it from every aspect and somehow you fell even more just by trying to convince yourself that it is a phase. Now all that’s left to do is ask yourself whether or not you’re willing to take that risk.

This may be one of life’s most mentally complex recipes out there. But sometimes the risks and all the ingredients and mess in between is worth the potential result you could get from it.

Her Campus at Wilfrid Laurier University