Let’s Grow Up From Ghosting

Whether you’ve done it or had it done to you, it’s probably likely that you’ve experienced ghosting at some point.

In case you don’t know what ghosting is (which is totally okay!), ghosting is basically when two people are talking and one person progressively stops engaging. They gradually disappear from the conversation altogether, hence the term ghosting. Harsh, right? Despite how much it hurts, ghosting is still something that has become common in dating culture.

Instead of opening up about how you feel and your worries, you just disappear. And although it’s totally valid to not reciprocate feelings, you don’t know how they feel about you - they could be head over heels for you. Even if you stopped talking to them, they might still be holding out hope that you’ll message them back. It’s not your fault, and you can’t control what they do or who they choose to have feelings for. But by being open and honest, it lets the person know where you both stand and allows them to move on and form new connections.

It definitely is an awkward conversation to have, but it’s the right thing to do. It can even just be something as simple as “Hey, I’m sorry but I don’t think this is working out for me.” Keep it short and sweet. I promise you’ll feel better once you get it off your chest. Instead of dancing around their questions as you gradually disengage, it’s a lot simpler to just be honest with them.

Aside from telling the truth being the morally right thing to do, ghosting is just immature and a childish way to move on from your problems. Yes, pretending your problems don’t exist might be the easiest way to handle things, but it’s definitely not the best. Stop hiding from your problems and face them head-on.

Although the “I’m just not that into you” conversation is hard to have, it’s a necessary step to allow you both to move forward. In the long run, ghosting will just make you both feel worse. If you’ve ghosted someone before, that’s okay! We’re all guilty of it. But next time, instead of just ghosting them, be open and honest instead.  It may suck to have to talk about your feelings in the moment, but in the long run, you will end up feeling better, and so will they.