Moving away from home is, and always will be, a naturally significant transition in life. For many people, leaving their hometown for university might be the first time being away from home for a long time. But, moving away from life with parents can also be liberating and exciting.
I always thought of myself to be an independent person who didn’t need nor wanted to rely on others, especially my parents. In my senior year of high school, I knew I wanted to attend a university far outside my hometown. And so I did, nearly 5000 kilometres away, to be exact. I didn’t know anyone else that was going to attend the same university as me, and it meant starting fresh, meeting completely new people and having new experiences.
Within the first couple of months of my first year, the novelty of living alone eventually wore off. Being a small university, it meant that most of my school friends lived close by and often went home to their families for the weekends. Holidays were the worst – I remember when everyone headed home to spend Thanksgiving with their families, and the entire residence building was near empty except for a handful of international students.
As most people will tell you, the best way to combat homesickness is to work through it rather than trying to resist or ignore it. Learn how to cope with homesickness and adjust accordingly to your new environment. Easier said than done, I know. If you’re away from family now for any reason, I hope these few tips can help you handle homesickness a little better.
Keep in touch, but not too much
Keeping in touch with family and friends from back home is a great way to remain involved in their lives, and they, yours. However, there’s a fine line between keeping in touch to lessen homesickness and keeping in touch too much and ending up feeling the distance even more. Don’t become so involved that you feel like you’re missing out. The best way to find an ideal balance is to not communicate with loved ones back home more than the people you interact with within your new surroundings.
Let it go and move on
I often found myself making it a habit of idealizing and talking about my old home. I’d frequently tell my friends about just about anything and everything about my hometown and how I felt it was better in almost every way. Of course, casual bragging about home is inevitable, and it’s often gotten me through a lot of conversations with new people as a useful conversation starter. Being continually nostalgic about home becomes problematic if it’s stopping you from appreciating and experiencing what you have in the present.
Personalize your space
One of the biggest reasons for homesickness is because unfamiliar surroundings make you feel uncomfortable. A small, dingy and unadorned dorm room will make you feel just as empty. Try to personalize your space! Decorate with pictures and posters or bring a special memento from your old life with you. Chances are, your roommates also have a stuffed animal or an old blanket from home in their rooms.
Create a new familiar
Setting up a sense of security and protection in your new home is essential to making the new place feel like your own. You’re in a new city, and there’s so much to explore and experience. Occupy your time by building new routines for a sense of familiarity. Create comfort by incorporating old or formulating new habits. Something as simple as scheduling a set time to visit the grocery store every week can be incredibly helpful in creating a sense of routine.
All in all, it’s important to remember that there’s nothing to be embarrassed about if you feel homesick. Whether you’re a freshman, in your 20s or even way older, missing your hometown family and friends is something that a lot of other people feel as well. Acclimating yourself to a new environment means homesickness will likely fade, but it also means you’ll have to do it all over again wherever you go next. Even though there are many small changes that you can make to overcome homesickness, the end goal is to find a home within yourself and with people around you.