You Deserve to Be Picky

He told me I had to pick two.

I was complaining to my friend about how I was sick of being single, and he told me that I am too picky when it comes to guys.

“I just want a guy who is kind, funny, and smart. I don’t think that’s too much to ask.”

“It is, you can’t expect that much from a guy.”


“You gotta pick two.”

All I could think about was the silly triangle meme that circulates Facebook every once in awhile: grades, sleep, social life – you can only have two. Except, I know a lot of people who have three; it’s called time management. Those people don’t have to settle, so why should I?

A lot of people have told me that I am too picky, but I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. I don’t even think I am picky. I don’t expect perfection from someone I’m dating – I don’t want perfection. That being said, why should I settle for a guy that I know I’m going to be annoyed with 10 minutes into the relationship when I realize that he doesn’t know the difference between “you’re” and “your”? Or when he tells me that my English degree is never going to get me a job? Or when I realize I haven’t really laughed in weeks? I’m not going to let myself fall for a guy when I know he’s not what I need in my life – I don’t want to get hurt, and I don’t want to hurt the guy when we ultimately break up.

I know a woman that just celebrated her 25th anniversary with her high school sweetheart. She was smiling as she told me about her relationship, how he still opens doors for her, and holds her hand in the park. They each have jobs and they have kids but they still try to have date night every Wednesday. I told her that she was really lucky; she simply answered, “I know I am.”

That’s what I want. I want to meet a guy and spend my happily ever after with him – and I know that he's out there. I have no desire to “play the field” or to date a bunch of boys that will barely matter in a few years time.

I’m not picky, and I’m not going to “pick two” because I deserve to have three.