The Worst Parts About Being Adult-ish

Okay, I’m going to be honest. I am not an adult. Not really. Like many students, I’m in this weird limbo where I’m fairly independent but I also call home when absolutely anything inconveniences me even slightly. I pay all my own bills and that’s kind of impressive, I guess. But, I also had a 35 minute debate with my dad about whether I should purchase a $40 heated blanket. I wanted the blanket because we keep my house freezing—because I pay my own bills now so that’s a priority. I’m adult-ish. And I hate it. Some things are definitely worse than others, but, I’ve compiled a list of the absolute worst in hopes that someone can relate and I won’t feel so alone in my adult-ish struggles.

1. Shoveling the Driveway

Honestly, this is probably number one for me right now because there’s over a foot of snow outside. My roommates and I shoveled three times in one day, because you know if you don’t keep up with it it’s going to be hell later on. Honestly, I’d probably just leave it all there and suffer but thankfully, I have responsible roommates. This kid has it figured out, I aspire to be him.

2. Salt on the Roads + Windshields

This is a new grievance of mine. Mostly due to a cracked windshield. While the first thing I did when I discovered the crack was call my dad, it’s still something I have to deal with. I have to call my insurance people and I have to find a place to fix it. Worst of all, I have to clean out my car to get it fixed because it really is too disgusting to be seen by the eyes of strangers. All this because some truck slung a loose piece of salt from the road into my windshield. Rude.

3. Fruits and Veg

This is law. This is science. I could write a whole thesis on this. Fruit and veg goes bad faster when you pay for it yourself. I always took for granted the bananas that always sat in my house, ripe for the picking. However, when I buy the bananas it’s like I have a solid 48 hours to eat five bananas or decide if I’m making banana bread (I’ve never made banana bread, usually they get thrown out or left for my nutrition student roommates to do something with.)

4. Laundry LIES

Let me explain this one because I wanna say most of us have been doing their own laundry for a while. I’ve been doing mine since the fourth grade. For years under the guise of my parents’ instructions I’ve been sorting my laundry into whites, darks and colours. Towels were another story all together. For years I’ve had to do a minimum of three loads of laundry at a time. I’m here to tell you, that that is not necessary. Yeah, it’s important for newer clothes, or nicer clothes, but who has the time or the money for that? Not me. These days my laundry is maybe sorted into two loads—stuff I can put in the dryer and stuff I can’t—and this is just to maximize the amount of time I can spend being lazy.

5. Exhaustion

I’m so tired. All the time. There isn’t a minute, when I’m not like: damn, I could really use a nap. When did this happen? Why? In high school I could scrape by on three hours of sleep. Sure, I’d spend the day yawning, but I could do it. These days if it looks like I’m only going to get three hours of sleep it also looks like I’m not going to class. That’s not just me being lazy, I can’t run on no sleep anymore, I can’t think, or take notes, or cook a meal. I can't exist. I need naps to survive. I’ve done extensive research on what kinds of naps are ideal—twelve minutes is my sweet spot—yet I still succumb to the four-hour alarmless nap after class that ruins my day completely. I love sleep, I miss sleep. I want to be asleep right now. Is it going to be like forever? Please, send help.

Maybe I’m bitter. Right now, I sit here and it is negative thirty outside and I want to scream constantly. I’m cold, I’m tired, and there’s currently a container of raspberries in my fridge that I didn’t eat and bananas on my counter waiting to be relocated. I’m probably just grumpy. But being this adult-ish person sucks. Give me bills any day of the week—at least they’re predictably painful. I’m sure these things too will become common practice, but right now, I’m over it.

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