From my own experience, if there is one thing that changes in a long-term relationship, it’s the sex. Not that it gets worse, it just becomes less frequent. After speaking to a few other people who have also been in a committed relationships, many say the same thing: life got in the way and they both became lazy. Rather than seeing sex as something to enjoy, it instead becomes a chore.
Let me ask you something, though. Do you remember how you couldn’t get your clothes off fast enough when you walked through the front door? Remember when sleeping just wasn’t a thing, because you were too busy getting busy under the sheets? Remember how it felt to crave the person’s hands on your body?
You can become those people again with just a little more effort. But to help you out, here is a list (compiled by the Her Campus Western Ontario ladies and myself) of ways you can spice things up in the bedroom and get out of your “sex-lull”:
1. Role Play
The sexy maid is a classic.
2. Sex Toys
Vibrators are fun to use, but they’re even more fun when someone else uses it on you.
3. Lingerie
Probably my favourite way to “get in the mood.” Not only does it look great, it makes you feel amazing.
4. Dirty Talk
Telling them how much you’re loving what they’re doing will make it sexier, trust me.
5. Hot Baths
Soaping each other up is a great way to explore, enjoy, and get excited about each other’s bodies
6. Sexting
A little preview for what’s to come … if you catch my drift.
7. Doing it Anywhere Other Than the Bedroom
Up against the wall, on the coffee table, on the kitchen counter, in the shower, etc.
8. Light BDSM
Some light bondage can be fun … maybe even some spanking.
9. Try New (and freaky) Sex Positions
Cosmopolitan is a good place to go for this one.
10. Sexy Game Night
Cut up strips of paper and write down sexy things (e.g. give your partner a lap dance), then put them in a small bowl or container, shake them up, and take turns choosing. I guarantee you won’t be able to get through half the bowl before you end up doing your own thing.
11. Watch Porn Together
Sometimes a little competition is all you need to really get in the mood.
12. Anal Sex
It’s not for everyone, but you might be surprised. It’s something new and exciting to explore, and may establish an even deeper connection with your partner.
13. Whipped Cream
Makes oral sex a delightful treat.
14. Sexy Music
Music is a perfect way to set the mood for a sexy evening. Need ideas? Check out the HCWO Sex Playlist!