By this point in the semester, it typically hits us how fast life is moving, am I right? It was literally just the first week of September, the first whispers of fall starting to show, backpack sweat on our skin, going out outfits didn’t involve jackets and boots, and homework wasn’t thirty pages long. Suddenly I blinked, and it’s almost finals week? I don’t remember everything that happened in between (aside from Halloweekend and way too many boxes of mac and cheese…), but I do know that with the end of the semester comes a whole heck of a lot of stress and anxiety and this general feeling of “must get things done” that tends to overtake every other feeling. I’ve found myself saying no to hangout sessions, nights out at the bars, and movie nights with my roommates because I feel this urge to be productive and have everything in my life in order and all lined up. Everything must be efficient, on schedule, and completed to the Nth degree of perfection. And if I’m being honest, that mindset is draining me. As much as I might want to be the most productive version of myself, I’m losing sight of the things that have really started to matter to me. And don’t get me wrong, of course, you should prioritize your future and your career and be as productive as you want, but at the same time, enjoy life a little on the way to success, you know?
We’re at a point in our lives that is so precious and tumultuous, filled with memories and so many emotions – it’s overwhelming, I get it. You feel like you have to prove yourself now in order to get a job or apply to grad school or just to prove to that one family member over Thanksgiving that you’re not just a burnt-out college student. But within those feelings of inadequacy that we might try to quell, and those fleeting moments of ecstasy that we chase after, there has to be a balance. Living intentionally during those in-between moments allows us to savor the good ones even more.
Romanticize your life. Make your midterm notes look pretty. Say yes to those late-night study sessions at the library with those kids from your class (they might seem weird but trauma bonding over schoolwork is a feeling like no other). You have to be intentional with how you live your life. We only have one (yolo!) and in practice, I genuinely feel like it’s made a difference in how I feel about things. I love planning my life out and knowing details and knowing how things are going to happen, but there’s a certain beauty in letting life happen to you. Letting yourself get swept up in the thrills of friendship and love, immersing yourself fully into that gen-ed that you think is just for credits, but realize that it’s teaching you more than you thought (I’m looking at you art history). Friends and happy times will always be there in life but there’s an unexpected feeling of fullness in knowing that you’re all here together, on the couch, watching the new Dancing with the Stars episode together, screaming over Robert Irwin’s footwork or Elaine Hendrix’s paso doble. Group hugs, classroom laughter, road trips, secret handshakes. Coffee runs and shared blankets. The quiet productivity when you’re all locked in but you know everyone is down for a laugh break, or the giggly, stumbling walks home from the bar. Walks to campus alone with your new playlist, or with a friend, talking about anything possible.
I honestly really love the independence that college brings and the fact that it’s so unbelievably easy to decide things for yourself. But at the same time, you have to understand what is actually good for yourself. Getting those midterm papers done is obviously good for you, but so is human connection. So is getting a little tipsy at your favorite bar with your favorite people. So is a lazy morning in bed, with blueberry pancakes and Earl Grey tea. It’s your only life, dude. Take your time with it and actually enjoy it. Don’t just rush through the steps you think you’re supposed to finish. Leave some room for the happy mistakes and the unexpected feelings – it’s good for you.