The Art of Procrastination

I am tired of all of the negative discourse about procrastination and I am here to change the narrative about it. As someone who consistently puts all of their work off until the last minute but consistently receives commendable grades in all of their classes, I feel as though I am eligible to speak on this topic. Now, am I saying you should be putting off everything in your life until the very last minute? Not by any means. I do not condone laziness, just procrastination. Two very different things, by the way. I am talking strictly about school work here, none of the important stuff that you should probably be submitting or responding to in a timely manner. If you are not someone that procrastinates, I applaud you. Relish in your stress-free life but just know that there are millions of us constantly grinding out masterpieces 30 minutes before the deadline while you spend an entire week writing a five-page paper. 

Let me begin by explaining how accepting procrastination into my life with welcoming arms has helped me tremendously throughout my college experience. I have been taught my entire life “how not to procrastinate” and “how procrastination leads to failure,” but throughout my 16 years of schooling, I have never been able to break the cycle. My mom would fight with me about staying up late in high school, and even now she struggles to understand why I would start a two-page paper at 11:00pm if the due date is in 59 minutes. I am someone who needs a deadline staring at me straight in the face in order for me to produce my best work, which I suppose would be called, “working better under pressure.” Every time I tried to get ahead of my work, I literally felt like Spongebob when he had to write about “what not to do at a stoplight” and all he managed to get down on the paper was “THE.” Except my pineapple house didn’t catch on fire. 

Once I was finally able to accept the reality that I work better under pressure, I have been using it to my advantage. I don’t procrastinate on ALL of my homework, trust me there are weekends that I simply cannot be bothered to do work and I will spend lots of time in the library during those weeks. This method is just how I have always produced my best ideas and executed perfection in a time crunch. I thought I might share with you the tried and true routine that has gotten me through those late nights. 

1. The first step I take is a precautionary procedure that ensures my assignments are “procrastinatable” because not all assignments can be saved for the last minute. The following checklist lists the traits of a “procrastinatable” assignment:
   1. Not a multi-step assignment. Ex. does not require an interview, presentation, group work, research, or other components.
   2. Can be completed in one sitting.
   3. Does not require learning a new concept or skill before starting. Ex. typically has a familiar format used in previous assignments.
   4. Has a manageable length.
2. I typically prepare a nice place to work in, preferably one where I am sitting upright at a desk. I make sure to keep plenty of water with me, possibly a snack, and my blue light glasses for my sensitive eyes. Sometimes I will get myself ready for bed (depending on how late it is) so that I can just hop into bed after I finish all of my work.
3. I like to get the busy work out of the way, so I typically sort them from easiest to complete to most difficult, saving the lengthiest assignment for last. I prefer writing my assignments down in order so that I can cross them off of my to-do list after I complete them. Don’t we all love that feeling of accomplishment? 
4. Putting my phone away is the most important step to my routine. Doom-scrolling late at night is a habit I presume we all have, so I keep my phone out of reach for this process. Besides, no one is sending me a text at 1:04am anyway. 
5. Now it is time to get-to-gettin. The best part about this is that I rarely need to pause for brain breaks because my ideas and creativity flow right from my head to the paper. I rarely find myself in a rut or what they call “writer’s block” when I am in procrastination mode, mostly because I don’t have time to be in one. The pressure is on, and for me, that is a good thing!

Procrastinating takes a lot of knowing yourself. I urge you to only allow yourself to procrastinate if you know you work best under pressure. This is not a free pass to disregard your mental and physical health, so make sure you are taking care of yourself during those late nights of studying. Get yourself a pair of blue light glasses, hydrate, and find a comfortable but practical spot for your next late-night essay. And please, let this method only be used for school work, again, I do not condone laziness! I want all of the procrastinators out there to feel seen and know that your method might be madness, but it works for you and that is okay. I say with full confidence that after 16 years of education, I have mastered the art of procrastination. 

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