Over Thanksgiving Break, I kind of made a bold move…okay maybe an extremely bold move. I shaved off all of my hair and started a new self-care and self-love journey and there are a couple reasons why:
Breaking Away from Negative Mindsets
One of the reasons that I decided to shave off all of my hair and join the #BaldieMovement was because I felt a constant pressure to have long and nicely textured hair in order to feel beautiful and valuable as a woman. At 21 years old, I should not be evaluating my self-worth by other people’s ignorant perceptions of what a woman should look like. So, I went to the Classic Man Barber Lounge in New York City and let Frank Billini work his magic and I’m loving it so far! Maybe cutting my hair was an act of rebellion, but it was also a way for me to force myself to love me for who I am and not my hair.
Damaged Hair
If you’re not familiar with my hair journey, I’ve had locs for 10 years and combed them out 2 years ago to rock my loose natural hair. During my natural hair journey, my hair endured a lot of high-maintenance styles that led to breakage and damaged ends. I thought that I could solve this issue with Jamaican Black Castor Oil and a trim that I did at home, but my hair just could not bounce back from the damage. If I’m being honest, I didn’t realize how damaged my hair was until I sat in the barber chair. I was so reluctant to chop off my hair before because I felt that as a black woman I needed to prove to everyone that Black women’s hair can and does grow! But I soon grew tired of being a display image for society’s approval of Black women and my hair grew tired of that too which was reflected in the damage.
I Am Not My Hair
The last reason why I decided to chop off my hair was because I wanted the world to see me for me. I became way too consumed in what my hair looked like on a daily basis and what I thought people would think about my hair. It became toxic and draining for my self-image and how I value self-love in myself. It started to feel like my hair was used as a tool to please others rather than it being a reflection of who I am as a person and where I am in my life. My big chop is me saying that I am not my hair, see who I am first, and then we’ll talk about my hair.
Me shaving my hair off wasn’t something that I planned on doing for months on end. I literally woke up one day and thought, “Why not start over? Why not start fresh?”, and so that’s what I did. I thought that I would leave the barber chair regretting my decision, but I’ve never felt more liberated to not worry what to do with my hair on a daily basis. I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t anxious, but it was more of a shock factor and I quickly got over that. I’ve learned to live in the moment and realized that hair is just hair. I’m proud of myself for embarking on this new hair journey and for choosing myself over the opinions and thoughts of others as a way for me to continue growing and blooming as a young black woman on a self-care and self-love journey.