TW: Eating Disorders
Mirrors are my enemy
Disguised as my best friend,
Looking into its reflection every chance I get
Lifting up my shirt,
Where a glance of my stomach
Starts a battle of too much and not enough
Too much of me,
Not enough worth
The words of self-destruction wrapping around me
Like a corset embedded in my waist
Held captive to the calories I’ve just consumed
The love for myself is measured on a scale
Where I find that most of my self-worth has been flushed down a toilet
Rather than existing within me
Deceived by a number that could only be worthy
If it was smaller
And smaller
And smaller
It’s hard to find self-worth
When there isn’t much of yourself to love
But what is self-love?
Because when I look at this body
I realize that I would love it
If it weren’t mine