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Temporarily disable my account.
Why are you disabling your account?
Just need a break.
To continue please re-enter your password…
Wait but what if I miss out on something? How will I even know what’s going on in the world? What if someone posts something interesting while I’m offline?
So many questions and doubts run through my head before I re-enter my password. Every few months I go through this process where I disable my main Instagram account for a few days. There are just some days where I feel like I can’t breathe on Instagram or I feel like I just want to get away from people, something I’m sure you relate to. However, I always keep my finsta because I still want to know what Neymar and Kylie Jenner are up to.
Last week I tried something different: I deactivated my main and my finsta. I deleted the whole app. It might not sound like a big deal but I realized that for the past 8 years of my life this has been something I’d check every day and if I didn’t, there was a perfectly good reason for it. Let me explain what I noticed over the course of the week.
Firstly, whenever I was bored (which was pretty often), I’d go to Instagram to look at funny videos or memes on my explore page. But I couldn’t do that. I found myself dying of boredom for the first few days. I’ve already watched everything on Netflix and Youtubers are not my cup of tea, so what was I supposed to do? Well eventually, I took up reading like I used to. I went on walks with my mom and even spent more time with my family, something I hadn’t done in a while.
Secondly, being disconnected from social media meant less drama! On Instagram, you don’t have to be directly involved in the drama to feel the toxic energy from it. Whether it’s drama between two celebs, influencers or even people you know, it gets exhausting and annoying to see them publicize their drama and sneak-diss each other. With all of that gone, I felt like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. You know that thing in the back of your head that constantly makes you feel anxious? All these days I thought it was my assignments, but I realized it was actually Instagram.
Since the beginning of quarantine, my screen time had been 7-8 hours on my phone. This week it went down to an astonishing one hour! One of my biggest fears of deactivating Instagram was not being able to know updates of things going on in the world. Have there been any steps taken to help the Muslims in concentration camps or have they finally arrested the cops that killed Breonna Taylor? How was I supposed to know? Without Instagram, I noticed I was making more of an effort to do that research myself. Instead of learning things from threads, I was learning it from news outlets. However, we know how biased news outlets are, so I still snuck onto Twitter here and there to find the less fabricated truth. Not only was I more aware of the things going in the world, but I was also more aware of my own self and surroundings. I was definitely taking better care of myself and eating better.
I’m back on Instagram now to post for my art account but if I could hire someone to do that for me, I would. Cause girl, after eight years, I felt like I could finally breathe.