Ah February, the month of love. Valentine’s Day is this month and as someone who is about to be spending her twentieth Valentine’s Day by herself, I can vouch for all of us single folk that this time of year can feel extra lonely. It’s almost impossible to go out on February 14th as a single person because you’re just reminded of your loneliness while being surrounded by all of the cute couples doing cute couple-y stuff. This time of year does a great job of amplifying feelings of loneliness, however, I’m here to tell you why being alone can actually be a good thing.
Independence:
Let me be the first to tell you – I hate being alone. I always say, if given the choice, I’d rather live the rest of my life surrounded by people 24/7 rather than being alone for the rest of eternity. I like being around people and enjoy the company of others. And when it comes to relationships, I like having constant support and someone to turn to in times of struggle. However, I’ve learned that being alone has helped me become more independent. I can count on myself for things I thought I’d always need help with. I learned how to be self-sufficient and to be my own person and when it comes down to it, you’re always left with yourself at the end of the day and I’m glad I can be there for myself when I need it.
Understanding Self & Self-Growth:
You learn a lot about yourself when you’re alone. Today’s society loves to tell us who we are. We’re constantly being labeled and put into boxes by other people, but in reality, we know ourselves best. And being alone helps us learn things about ourselves that we didn’t know before. After my first big heartbreak, I realized I didn’t really know who I was without my boyfriend with me. And that’s a big problem. I learned so much about myself and my strengths when I was alone. I learned how to be myself, be more confident in myself, and most importantly – how to love myself. And it wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t spent that time learning about myself alone.
Focus on Other Relationships:
Not only do you get to focus on yourself while being single, but you can also focus on the other non-romantic relationships in your life. You can spend more time with your family and friends and build stronger relationships with them. Having strong relationships outside of romance can help highlight the pros of being single and why sometimes, you just don’t need no mans.
Motivation:
Being alone is motivating. You have no one telling you no, no one slowing you down, and no one holding you back. I found that being alone can inspire you and can motivate you to work towards your dreams. You have no limits besides yourself and you feel empowered. Of course, in terms of a relationship, having someone to support you is nice. But being alone can help refocus you and let you set goals for yourself that you never thought were possible before.
Being Ready For the Right Person:
Now I know, the time spent single shouldn’t solely be focused on waiting around for the “right” person. However, being able to work on yourself and grow as an individual can help you later on down the line in the love department. You can’t love someone else until you love yourself. Instead of being bummed out about being single, focus on being the best and happiest version of yourself so that when someone who is actually deserving of you comes around, you can enter that relationship knowing you’re in the best place to do so.
Now, I’m not saying you should be alone forever. Or that you should break up with your significant other right now. And I’m not saying that isolating yourself is a good thing either. If you’re feeling down for being single or being alone, understand that there are positives and benefits that come from being on your own and take advantage of them!