If you haven’t heard, T.I. was recently on the podcast Ladies Like Us discussing “Life Hacks”, an episode that has now been removed from the podcast’s site. Apparently, one of his life hacks is to go to the Ob-Gyn with his 18-year-old daughter to discuss her “virginity.” Can we just say ew? Sadly, it doesn’t end there. By the age of 18, and sometimes even before that age, the HIPPA law comes into play. We get to designate who gets to have access to our medical records. Well, T.I. coerced his daughter into making the doctor tell him if her hymen was still intact, which was when the doctor reminded him that hymen’s don’t just break from sex.
This is now the place where I get to share that the respect I once had for the rapper has gone out the window and also where I get to thank my father for never being this sexist. And yes, for those of you who are reading this, T.I’s actions were not only sexist, they were also abusive. At some point, the doctor should have made him leave the room and focused more on the young woman in front of them than on the overbearing father who didn’t need to be in that room. When he asked the question about her hymen, the doctor should have done more to protect the privacy of their patient.
That’s not the only thing. T.I. may want his daughters to be virgins, but apparently he doesn’t like virgins. He was reported saying on the show that virgins are “no fun.” He continued by saying “Who wants a virgin? Like really? All that work.” So first, you want to make sure your daughter’s hymen is still intact and now you are shaming your daughter on a show thousands of women listen to about being a virgin which is apparently what you wanted? If we haven’t been reminded enough, the patriarchy is alive and well!
Here’s the deal. We need better sex education, because something like this doesn’t need to continue to happen. We also need to stop shaming people who are either virgins or sexually active. We need to remind every human being on this earth that the matters of a woman’s body are hers and hers alone. And lastly, the ob-gyn’s office should be a safe haven to women and not a place where overbearing men take control of what is or isn’t happening with a woman’s body. And I hope T.I.’s daughter takes a minute to explain to her father that his actions were not okay.