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What’s the Big Deal About “I Love You”?

"I love you.”

Three words, eight letters, It may not seem like a lot, but those three words can define a relationship, a friendship, or be the three words that reveal to someone how much you care. 

My roommate recently asked me “Why is saying ‘I love you’ such a big deal?” And at first, I couldn’t answer the question myself. I was wondering what exactly was the big deal too. In my previous relationship, it took him two weeks to tell me I love you. It took me 9 months. And yet, in my current relationship, it took both of us less than a month. What is the difference? I’m honestly unsure. There are different levels of feelings, different emotions involved, maturity levels, and so many other factors. 

I believe that the importance of those three words doesn’t lie in the “why,” “when,” or “how”, but more so in what it makes you feel. “I love you” holds a sense of security in them. I can’t really explain it and it isn’t an explainable thing for when or why someone feels it – you just do. The big deal about those three words though lies in what it entails: a future. 

"I love you” may not ensure a future, but it supports the idea of one. From my perspective and from what I hear from those around me, “I love you” defines commitment. It means you see a future with your significant other and you’re not afraid of it. It’s comfort. And I think that’s what is so important about “I love you” because it signifies much more than just the relationship, but the future of it.

So, in response to her question, I said: “It means something different for everyone I think. It’s a big deal because it means to some people that you see a connection with them. For me, it’s about the future. For others, it may be that they are their home or comfort. In all honesty, though, 'I love you' may just be three easy words to you. There’s no right answer.”