Kehlani, the young, beloved R&B artist, is an absolute icon for everyone. She’s fierce, talented, and successful. Her songs are beautifully written, produced, and highly relatable for all of us. I mean, I feel like one bad bitch when “Personal” comes on—I don’t know exactly who I’m dissing when I’m singing along, but they sure as hell messed up!
There are many attributes to Kehlani that make her a unique artist. Her story from America’s Got Talent, to homelessness, to her Grammy nomination is absolutely inspiring. She’s an advocate for mental health awareness and the LGBTQ+ community. In fact, the 23 year-old is a member of the community herself, identifying as queer. The term has had a rocky definition, once being a derogatory term against homosexuals. Today, it has been reclaimed by the LGBTQ+ community as a sexual orientation. The term is fairly simple and ranges in definition as sexuality is a spectrum and varies from person to person. In her case, she is attracted to a variety of people. In a now deleted tweet, she says, “cuz I keep geddin asked.. I’m queer. Not bi, not straight. I’m attracted to women, men, REALLY attracted to queer men, non binary people, intersex people, trans people…does that answer your questions?”
Yes, Queen, it does.
So, what is the point of all of this?
If you haven’t heard already, Kehlani is PREGNANT! She posted a gorgeous collage of herself glowing in a park. Literally glowing. No amount of moisturizer or highlight that I throw on my body will resemble her baby mama glow! While the responses to her announcement have been filled with love and support, some have steered in an oddly ignorant direction. Here’s a tweet from one user, DreGod, posting a collage of an article of Kehlani coming out, a photo of her pregnant, and a calculating Thanos meme.
Ha ha? If you’re confused, DreGod is expressing his confusion by Kehlani’s pregnancy because he thinks being queer is being lesbian… which means you can’t get pregnant, I guess? I know, my head already hurts from just thinking about that level of ignorance. Bear with me.
A week after it was released, the tweet received over 1,400 retweets, and 5,300 likes—and it wasn’t the only tweet of its kind. Clearly, there are some serious misconceptions about the LGBTQ+ community, and people aren’t afraid to make a joke about it.
While this may seem comical, it isn’t. For starters, there seems to still be a confusion about the term queer—which is okay. I myself wasn’t entirely aware of the new definition, but a simple Google search, as well as asking my friends from the LGBTQ+ community helped me gain a better understanding. However, what’s not okay is to immediately make false assumptions on a subject one is not fully informed on.
Lesbian, bisexual, queer, and even transgender women have the desire and the ability to have children. Kehlani’s pregnancy doesn’t mean she is “more straight”, or that her sexuality has suddenly changed. Her identity should not be in question based on her choices, and her label is not ours to judge. Kehlani’s beautiful pregnancy should not be a time to show our ignorance in her sexual identity. Primarily, it should be seen as what it is: a pregnancy. It should also be seen as an opportunity to learn about the spectrum that sexuality can lie on and support the LGBTQ+ community. In addition, it is an opportunity to learn about the different lifestyles people lead in our society today.
Kehlani, being the unbothered queen she is, claps back in a tweet, “imagine thinking queer means lesbian and either means unable to have babies.” We can’t imagine, Kehlani. We really can’t.
I wish Kehlani nothing but the best during her new journey as a mother, and may she keep educating all of us.