If you’re anything like I am, you’ve been anxiously waiting for the arrival of the triad of Kardashian-Jenner babies until they finally arrived (after what seemed like way more than 9 months). Now that the babies are here and their names have been announced, here’s my opinion on the ranking of Kardashian-Jenner baby names from worst to best.
DISCLAIMER: I love the Kardashians, I just think that they name their children poorly.
Saint
Saint: a person acknowledged as holy or virtuous and typically regarded as being in heaven after death.
I personally just think that it’s inappropriate to name a child Saint. I’m not religious, but I feel like using Saint as a name is disrespectful to religious people who actually believe in sainthood. In actual religious practices, becoming a saint can take decades…so it seems odd that this child became a “saint” after a few minutes of life. I don’t know, I just think it sounds wrong. Also, when she named her child Saint, it kind of seemed like she was just trying to one-up Kourtney, who named her child Reign…just sayin’.
Dream
Dream: a series of thoughts, images, and sensations occurring in a person’s mind during sleep.
Whenever anyone calls her “dreamy” it makes me laugh because I associate the term with my friends saying that about cute boys. I just think this name is bizarre.
Stormi
I feel like any name that should end in a y but ends in an i is inherently trashy. At least because it ends in the “ee” sound, it’s a bit cuter than Dream, but it’s still a weird name in my opinion. Again, I associate the word “stormy” with thunder and lighting and pouring rain…at least her name isn’t Butterfly like some people theorized.
Reign
Reign: hold royal office; rule as king or queen.
Kourtney decided to ruin her streak of cute baby names by naming her third child Reign. I feel like this isn’t so unusual since his father had taken it upon himself to call himself Lord Disick, but still, naming your child Reign seems like there’s an implication that this child is better than everyone else’s child…until Kim named her child Saint, of course.
True
True: the quality or state of being true; that which is true or in accordance with fact or reality
Khloe’s first born has been named “True,” which seems ironic because of how disloyal Tristan is. This name does have family significance, as it was Khloe’s grandfather’s name…so at least it didn’t show up out of the blue like the others.
Chicago
We’ve heard Brooklyn, we’ve heard Paris, we’ve heard Savannah, and even we’ve heard Arizona (thanks to Grey’s Anatomy), but Chicago? We might as well call Kim’s new baby “The Windy City.” At least the name has special meaning to the couple, as Chicago is where Kanye grew up…and I suppose the nickname “Chi” isn’t that bad.
North
When I first heard that Kim Kardashian named her child North I thought, it cannot get worse than this…but apparently she started a trend of terrible names in the family and in fact, I think that North is actually the best of the worst. Yes, this poor child’s name is North West, but at least they call her Nori (I think), which sounds a bit more like a name than the others.
Mason
The first of the Kris Jenner’s grandchildren, Mason has a great name. It’s simple, it’s classic. It’s “normal,” by whatever standard normal is. Mason is a great, adorable name. Kourtney started the family off right with this one.
Penelope
Ah, Penelope. The cutest name of them all. Again, Mason and Penelope were born before North, contributing to my theory that after Kim named her daughter North, everyone in the family started thinking, what is the most peculiar thing I could possibly name my child. Penelope is such a cute name, and it totally fits with her adorable personality.
By Elizabeth Baxter