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The Official Guide to Spring Break DOs and DON’Ts

Well collegiettes, it’s that time of year again; you just got over a cold, your midterms are over, and you can’t take one more flake of snow…it’s time for spring break! So before you pack up your suitcase and make your way to Cancun, try to remember these spring break dos and don’ts.

DO drink plenty of water…bottled, not local. You will be in the sun, doing a lot of activities outdoors, and let’s face it: you will probably be doing it all drunk or hung over. Make sure to drink plenty of fluids, allow your body to recharge and rehydrate, so that you can enjoy your vacation to the fullest.

DO lather up. Be careful to apply and reapply. You don’t want to transform into a lobster on the first day and be in pain the rest of the trip… your skin and your Facebook photos will thank you later.

DO try local things. You’re on vacation, so grab your friends and go parasailing or scuba diving! Hop into a funky bar, talk to that surfer guy on the beach and try that cow liver appetizer if it looks good. Seriously, when are you going to the Bahamas or Cape May again?

DO plan for all types of weather when packing clothes. It may seem redundant, but some places can get really cold at night and you don’t want to freeze your bare feet when you have the chills from sun poisoning.

DO stay with a couple of friends and never go anywhere by yourself. Leaving with some guys you don’t know may seem like a good idea when you’re intoxicated, but 9 times out of 10, it’s not. No matter who you vacation with, it’s important to stay within a close range of your travel partners.

DON’T drink something that you didn’t see the bartender pouring for you. Some get this phrase into their heads “Surprise me!” They figure they are on break, so what the heck. If you didn’t see the bartender pouring it, then lay off. Always keep track of your drinks and how many you had. Figure out how much you can handle in a bar in one night and don’t exceed that limit. There are going to be times when others might pressure you into exceeding that, but don’t let them.

DON’T take your clothes off and always remember to double-knot the tops. Take extra caution not to enter any “games” that hotels and clubs like to run at the cost of the collective dignity of spring breakers. If you feel the need to get nude or dance on the bar, don’t do it with a group of people cheering you on in front of a bunch of cell phones…There is this whole thing called “the Internet” and the other thing called “eternal unemployment and shame courtesy of YouTube” … Always think of what grandma would say! Spring break is no different from the rest of your life: Have fun; just don’t let anyone record you doing it.

DON’T do anything dangerous while intoxicated. Leave the driving to the taxis, the cooking to McDonalds and the swimming to the dolphins.

DON’T lose important things like your wallet, ID or credit cards. You need them for travel and getting into clubs (among other things). If you can’t keep track of your stuff, give it to someone who can handle the responsibility. The same goes for your camera and cell phone. You want to keep your vacation pictures and be able to call your friends when you are lost, so keep them safe.

DON’T break the bank. Restrain from going to the first souvenir shop you see and blow $150 on a giant crocodile head because it’s not going to fit in your suitcase. The same goes for buying something super-extravagant.

DON’T constantly update your Facebook status while on vacation. No one cares that you got seawater up your nose while you were swimming. You don’t need to do it just for the pictures. Enjoy your vacation instead of updating the world on how it’s going.

Finally, DON’T do anything you’re going to regret in the morning or even a week from now. This includes: cheating on your boyfriend, dropping your cell phone in the toilet (keep it out of those back pockets, ladies) and falling asleep in a hot tub. Spring Break is supposed to be a time to de-stress and relax, so have fun, be safe, and here’s to you having the best spring break of your life! 

Lace Nguyen is in her third year studying Comparative Literature at Washington University in St. Louis. While not entertaining college women with her wit and charm, she reads German novels and apologizes for how pretentious that sounds.
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