Welcome to college, where you can literally hear the couple in the room next to you having sex. You’d think with all the money that it costs to go to Wake they could have at least afforded thicker dorm walls. This combination of paper thin walls plus sexually active Deacs means you get to hear a lot more than you’d like to hear on a Tuesday afternoon (afternoon delight, anyone?)
*Image from AlliePhillips.com
So what’s the proper audio-etiquette when it comes to getting it on in close living quarters? I mean, we live so close, I can hear my suitemate sneezing. There’s no question that having sex makes noise, it is a physical activity. So how do you express, um, satisfaction, in a way that the neighbors don’t have to hear? I have a few suggestions…
The Ears Have It
A sound that may seem quiet in an empty room is magnified a thousand times if it’s delivered directly into the eardrum. If you want to moan or sign or “ohhhh,” do it into his ear. It’ll prevent you from having to be loud to get your point across. Also, it’s a lot more intimate and in my opinion, sexier. The warmth and vibration from your mouth against his ear will add to the moment.
*Image from SodaHead.com
Set a Schedule
I don’t think anyone would argue that it’s a lot more enjoyable to get it on when you don’t have to worry about someone walking in or listening. By now, you should know when your suitemates will be out and about. If you know you’re alone, you’ve got a bit more leeway in the sound effects department. This doesn’t mean you should be screaming at the top of your lungs, but it does give you license to be a little louder than usual.
Drown it Out
Music, the shower (try not to waste water, though), the TV, and background noise can help disguise any moans or groans. See, now everyone just thinks you’re watching a movie, really loudly.
*Image from TravelwithScott.blogspot.com
Just be Considerate, Please!
What may sound like a symphony of ecstasy to you and your man really just sounds sleazy and gross to the collegiettes living around you. Please don’t record a porn soundtrack when you KNOW your suitemates are right there! The noises, just like the intimacy of the moment, should be kept between you and your partner. Whisper in his ear and use a sexy, hoarse voice to get your point across. Louder sex doesn’t mean better sex… and you don’t want to sound like you’re faking it!