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Ask Ayla: What to do About Your Hometown Honey

 

So it comes – the time to head to school, start a new semester of classes, hang with your college friends, and make that oh-so-tough decision of what to do about your hometown honey. Now not every girl knows what it’s like, but chances are you or a close friend has been faced with this difficult decision before.

For some, the decision is as easy as 1-2-3, and for others, it could mean days of endless contemplation along with piles of pros and cons lists. Yes, every situation is different as is every relationship; but in the end, it all comes down to two choices: stay in a relationship or go to college single and ready to mingle.

For sophomore Katherine Ross (16’), deciding to stay with her boyfriend from home was easy.

“For me, I didn’t see any other option,” said Katherine. “I couldn’t imagine myself dating anyone else. [Making the decision] requires a lot of thoughtful communication. It’s a really personal decision, and you just have to do what’s right for you in the end.”

What separates Katherine from many of her female counterparts is that she was 100% confident when she decided to stay with her boyfriend in college. There were no doubts, what-ifs, or regrets. She was fully willing to exert all of the necessary effort in order to keep her relationship going strong.

Moral of the story ladies: if you’re someone who’s ready to do what it takes to make your long-distance relationship work, then I say go for it! But if you’re not at the place where you can make someone else a priority in your life, then maybe you should re-think if you’re really ready to make a long-distance commitment.

There is something you must consider, however, and it bears a pretty significant amount of weight in any long-distance relationship –  the willingness of your significant other to put in the work, too. If you’re dating someone who isn’t exactly sure of his commitment to you, then that’s essentially a big, flashing neon sign that your relationship just isn’t meant to go the distance. 

Now in a perfect world if your boyfriend were to pull a Noah Calhoun and tell you that, “…it’s not going to be easy. It’s going to be really hard; we’re going to have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever. You and me everyday,” then I would say he’s pretty darn committed. But since we don’t live in a perfect world, something along those lines should work too.

In the end it all comes down to the give and take; just be sure that you’re not the one doing all of the giving and let someone else do some of the taking. 

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Ayla Yazdani

Wake Forest

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