The people you surround yourself with are the people who you will become most like.
I am a firm believer in that statement. Whether its friends, family, co-workers or partners, the traits your close peers project will inevitably become a part of you. It’s common to hear the word “toxic” thrown around during discussions nowadays. And although removing toxic people from your life may not seem like an act of personal health, it most definitely is.
Sadly, we tend to not see a person’s or situation’s toxic characteristics instantly. Whether we know it or not, one person can be detrimental to our daily moods, attitude, grades, sleep schedule and many more aspects of life.
Identifying toxic people in your life isn’t always easy. This is because, more often than not, you are blinded by some factor (love, finances, safety, fear, etc.) and are unable to fully recognize the pain you are enduring from these toxic individuals. It’s easy to think you would never let anyone treat you poorly, or that you’d never let someone yell at, manipulate or disregard you and your feelings. But it isn’t that simple.
You play it off. The harsh words, the lying, the mind games and the backhanded compliments. You play it off because it’s much easier to laugh at a situation than cry.
You doubt yourself. You start to second guess your instincts and believe anything this person is telling you, because you want to believe that they are telling the truth, that they are treating you right and that they respect you enough to not play with your head.
Other people will notice. Those closest to you will probably comment on your situation. Maybe he or she will say they are concerned, maybe they will say they are just checking in or maybe he or she will straight up tell you they don’t think this situation is healthy.
Whether you listen or not has nothing to do with who is talking to you but everything to do with who and what you have to fall back on. You need a strong support system, a group of individuals who will be by your side in any circumstance. You need a passion. Something that will make you want to get up in the mornings. Something that makes you excited about the future. And most importantly, something that cannot be taken away from you.
I am fortunate enough to have a close-knit group of girls who are less like friends and more like family. These girls build me up when I am at my lowest point. They wipe away the tears on my face and fix my makeup. They make me laugh when it seems like I never will again. And they push me to face every challenge with positive mindset.
In each friend I have, I see one or more distinct traits which I admire. Hopefully, they see some in me. With time, we are able to teach each other better habits and are able to reflect on ourselves and ask, what can I do better?
Cut your toxic ties and reinvest in your relationships with positive influences. If this is the sign you needed to block that boy or girl, text your childhood best friend or take a social media detox, do it. Everyone has something they can always improve. It’s important to take the time to consider what is holding you back from accomplishing the tasks you wish to. Once you find that source, re-evaluate if he, she or it is necessary to keep in your life.
And just a quick PSA, you are an 11 on a scale from 1-10 and if anyone ever makes you feel like you are anything less, say Thank U, Next.
Image Source: