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Why We Need to Aim Higher When it Comes to Relationship Goals

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at VCU chapter.

Ah, relationship goals – easily the corniest trend to plague our generation. Now, let me start off by saying that this isn’t going to be a rant about how much I hate this generation and how I’m an old soul and blah, blah, blah. No. This is all about the fact that romantic relationships in this day and age pretty much suck and it isn’t exactly this generation’s fault. I, too am a millennial (even though I hate that word), so I refuse to stand on the outside looking in like this isn’t my problem, too.

Let’s put this into perspective. There’s the stupid “talking” stage that lasts anywhere from two weeks to six months where everything’s pretty much up in the air and you have no idea when you’re allowed to start getting mad. Then, there’s the fact that no one goes on dates anymore until they’re actually a couple, which makes little to no sense being that first dates are a great way to get to know someone new. Then, there’s the fact that no one knows how to communicate whether or not they’re looking for something long-term or just looking for a fling. Throw in the added relationship drama that comes with the internet, social media and cell phones and you’ll have the full list of reasons why relationships in this generation don’t always work. Obviously, not everyone’s relationship is trash, and no, I don’t expect perfection, but it’s time to think about why such simple things make us so happy.

You can log into your account on literally any social media platform and see regular photos of random couples that have somehow become everyone’s relationship goals simply because it happens to be a picture of some guy feeding ice cream to some girl, or maybe it’s a photo of a guy tying some girl’s shoe, or maybe it’s a photo of two guys holding hands and walking along the beach, or maybe it’s a photo of John Legend helping Chrissy Teigen with her necklace, or maybe it’s a photo of Kanye West holding the car door open for Kim Kardashian-West or maybe it’s a photo of A.S.A.P. Rocky applying chap-stick to Kendall Jenner’s lips. Whatever the case may be, they all have one thing in common: These people are in relationships. They are doing things for each other because they should. It’s just that simple.

I know what you’re thinking. You knew this already. I mean, how could you not know that your significant other should help you with your necklace if you’re struggling? How could you not know that literally any nice person would hold a car door open for a pregnant woman? How could you not know how you’re supposed to be treated in a relationship?

Has it really gotten this bad? Have relationships become situations where two people call themselves a couple, but don’t even partake in any of the basic relationship deal-breakers? Here’s my call to action: aim higher.

I’m not here to tell anyone what their relationship goals should be, because ultimately, it’s up to the person. What I am here to say is that we should all want the best for ourselves. As a person that knows what it’s like to be in a relationship with a toxic person, what I can say is that you are not asking for too much. Certain actions should come with relationships and I think we all know what those are.

Image: Pinterest

Erica Dabney is a senior at Virginia Commonwealth University. Some of her favorite activities include discovering new music, tearing down the patriarchy and dining out at black-owned restaurants in Richmond. She plans to graduate with her bachelors in journalism in 2019.
Keziah is a writer for Her Campus. She is majoring in Fashion Design with a minor in Fashion Merchandising. HCXO!