While most people reserve lingerie for a special someone, I think that first and foremost, you should wear lingerie for yourself. For me, wearing lingerie for myself is an act of self-love. When I first started wearing lingerie for myself, it was the first time I had truly looked at my body and loved all my stretch marks and curves. Lingerie is my way of taking ownership of my body and reminding myself that I am sexy because sexiness should not be reserved for just your partner in intimate times. Rather, sexiness is a form of body-appreciation and confidence-building that women need to reclaim. As a single woman, lingerie reminds me that I don’t need to be in a relationship to feel sexy.
Initially, I found lingerie intimidating because it promotes sexuality in a manner that I have never experienced. As women, we are often taught to feel shame for our bodies and our sexuality. Lingerie allowed me to break away from this mentality and accept my body for all that it is. My body does not exist for a man’s pleasure, so there is no reason why I should reserve lingerie for a man either. Loving your body and taking ownership of your sexuality, while it seems simple, is an act of defiance women can take against our patriarchal and suppressive society.
Wearing lingerie for yourself also serves as good practice for when you want to wear it for a partner. So many women feel ‘silly’ in lingerie because they don’t truly feel comfortable and sexy. Perhaps this is one of the reasons why lingerie doesn’t stay on for too long when you wear it for your partner. Wearing lingerie for yourself allows you to experiment to see what style you like and what style empowers you.
Lingerie is also one of the best ways to spice up your day with such little effort. On days where I wear lingerie underneath my clothes, I feel a bit giddy because I have this exciting secret that only I know. That giddiness translates into a confidence boost you didn’t know you needed. There’s something about lingerie that can make you feel both feminine and powerful. So, don’t bother saving it for a special occasion or a special some. Wear it in your everyday lives and definitely wear it on days where you need a little pick-me-up.
When buying lingerie for the first time, pay extra attention to how it fits on you. Good lingerie should be well-fitted, comfortable, and empowering. If it feels tight or unsupportive, it is not right for you. Finding your perfect match might take some time, but trust me, it is so worth it. Lingerie doesn’t have to be overly sexy with lots of laces and straps. Sometimes, the simplest designs are the best ones. And most importantly, buy and wear what truly reflects your personality and style.
Before falling in love with anyone else, fall in love with your body first and explore your sexuality with some lingerie!