Trends That Need to Stay in 2016

I think we all can admit 2016 was not a banner year for the world. It saw countless violent acts (and don’t get me wrong as I write this, I certainly do not take these lightly), the election of a misogynistic Cheeto to the most important position possibly in the world and the revival of several '90s trends that certainly didn’t need to make it past ‘99. There are some things I hope will stay in 2016, things that have become popular (read: gone viral) that are absolutely stupid. Here are some of them:

1. Pointless viral video challenges. This trend started way back with the ice bucket challenge, which was at least for a good cause. Nowadays, all you have to do is stand really still to get a bunch of views on the Internet. Let’s review some of the worst ones:

  • The Running Man Challenge. You literally just have to run on beat with a slight bit of rhythm to a song that was released in 1995 and meant nothing to any of us until some random person started running in place while it played.

  • The Mannequin Challenge. Once you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all. Can you please stop clogging my Facebook feed with these videos and go back to unnecessarily posting intimate details about your personal life? Frankly, I’d prefer that.

  • Throwing a water bottle. I don't know if this is considered a challenge, but the majority of the people fail at it and then try to make it look like it worked, which is funny the first time. But it gets significantly less so after the sixth.

2. Crazy Makeup

  • Nail polish towers. I’ll be honest, I watched the first video because it was kind of entertaining -- the notion of applying 100 layers of nail polish to your nails and seeing the 3D tower that results. But YouTubers took it way too far. There were about 1,000 nail polish towers before everyone started to apply 100 layers of any product they could find to get views.

  • Snapchat-inspired makeup worn any other day but Halloween. This makes for an awesome, albeit basic Halloween costume. But if you’re getting your makeup inspiration from an app that’s meant to send funny pictures to your friends, you should probably rethink everything.

  • Rainbows. Yes, they are pretty, but they really aren’t meant to be worn on your face. While I’ll admit these look kinda awesome, I think it should become something of the past in 2017.

  • Glitter everywhere when it’s not New Year's Eve or Coachella. I love glitter just as much as the next person, but I don’t think anyone likes it being left on every surface you touch so do us all a favor and skip the “glitter tears” (see below).

3. Stupid nail trends. I’m not sure if the creators of this nail art realize just how impractical it is to have fur and fake plants on your nails. I mean how are you supposed to scratch your nose when you get an itch or pick up the quarter you dropped at the cash register or I don’t know FUNCTION with those?

4.  Weird '90s trends. Some of the '90s trends I can get on board with and considering their popularity. These include crop tops, chokers, velvet, silk dresses and crystal heels. Notice that big baggy ripped up jeans with legs wider than your waist are not on that list. Neither are paisley, fanny packs or overalls so can we please PLEASE leave them behind after New Year's?

5. "Hacks." Unless you don’t ever go on the Internet you’ve probably seen that hack videos have become very popular. And some of them for good reason, they’re really meant to make life easier. But there are some that are just so unnecessary it’s almost laughable. For example, why curl your hair with a curling iron, when you could spend just as much time using the bunch of bananas you bought from the grocery store or with a pencil and a flat iron? That was a joke because if you’re literally saving no time or effort, then is it really a hack or just a stupid alternative to a way easier process?

You can be certain there are so many other trends that don’t need to see the light of day in 2017. I hope you were able to get a little bit of a laugh over just how bad 2016 was. All we can do is hope that 2017 isn’t half as bad and we should be alright!