I’ve never liked Donald Trump; I didn’t have this incredible revelation when this video surfaced. He gave the intolerant individuals of America a platform to continue their ignorance and label it as “Well, I like him because he speaks his mind.” When he announced he was running I genuinely believed it was a joke. As the months progressed many people, myself included, stopped laughing.
We began to actually fear for the future. The fact is, we can talk about policies for days, but the person who will be spending the next four to eight years as the leader of the free world matters. So before you say I’m not focusing on the politics; I’ve yet to hear an individual say they love Trump’s policies but hate the man. The majority of the people who support Trump, support the man himself, not solely based on his political stances.
Listen, I can talk for days about how awful this man is, but due to recent events regarding this presidential candidate and the terrifying responses trying to defend him, I personally feel the conversation reviewing what consent is and is not is imperative right now; especially among college students where one in five women and one in 16 men in college are sexually assaulted. The biggest defense made so far is that men and women talk this way all the time. Let’s speak candidly, is your disgusting co-worker/ “locker room” buddy running for president of the United States of America? No? Oh okay.
Just some reminders to some very interesting college-aged Trump supporters:
What if they’re physically unable to say no?
So scary that this needs to be said and repeated frequently. If an individual CAN’T say NO, it in NO way means yes. Intoxicated/high/passed out it doesn’t matter what the situation is that has presented itself. The only thing you need to be doing is getting that person help.
What if s/he “led you on,” but no longer want to continue?
You’re hanging out, things are getting heated, s/he politely starts saying things like; “Oh hey, wow this is hot, but I have to be up early in the morning,” or “Hey, I really think this may be going too fast,” or “I’m not super comfortable with you yet” or “I thought I was ready to do this with you, I’m no longer feeling this way,” these phrases mean STOP.
What if that individual isn’t voicing no, but she or he is visibly upset?
This is important because this could mean someone you’ve been with for a while. Being with someone doesn’t make them your property with which you can do anything. If your SO is upset or not into the events unfolding, and you can tell they’re “going through the motions” just for you, calm down and remind them their feelings matter and back up. The fact of the matter is it doesn’t take a brilliant individual to realize when someone isn’t “feeling” it. The excuse of “s/he never vocally said no” doesn’t hold up. It’s insanely easy to tell if you’re pressuring someone, especially if you’ve been with them for months/years.
If it’s not yes. It’s no.
My genuine fear is, if a man who so clearly treats women so horribly is elected president, this already MASSIVE issue could only get bigger.
For survivors of sexual assault; hopefully you know this, but just in case, no matter the circumstance, you are a survivor. You should be able to wear anything you want and you should be able to have fun with your friends without fear. You deserve a SO who understands when you don’t want to sleep with them, you deserve to be heard, please know that you deserve the world.
Lastly, for individuals who have supported and continue to support a presidential candidate who is so clearly intolerant as well as promotes (yes, promotes) grabbing women with no consent:
Wake up.