Dear 10-year-old me,
Wow,
I can’t believe we are already here. 10 years later. The distance from me to you is the distance from me to 30-year-old us. Do you know how scary that is? Time gets so fast, kid. I know you still complain about being bored and having nothing to do but trust me, you’ll be begging for boredom in less than five years.
Remember Disneyland? For you, it was only a month or so ago. I hate to tell you but getting all of the characters/actors signatures will not be what you remember most from that trip. You’ll remember the huge bunk bed you stayed on that whole week and stretching your tiny legs to push on the ceiling. With your still in-tact imagination, you wondered what was behind the water-stained tiles that dangled precariously over top of you. You’ll remember the feeling of the hairdresser pushing her freshly manicured nails across your scalp to give you princess braids that you will refuse to take out for two weeks after. You will even remember that giant flower arrangement at the entrance of the park.
My point is: you will remember the small things so much. They will make you who we are. The brief things that your friends say will resonate with you for years and the people who truly matter will only say things that will resonate positively.
I can’t even begin to tell you how many times you’ll “fall in love.” I won’t tell you to not go for those middle school boys because you will learn so much about men from them. Just know that you won’t have children with Ryan Wiley. He wouldn’t even let you meet his parents… like what?
At one point you will actually fall in love and it will suck when he dumps you. I won’t mention his name because you shouldn’t avoid him. He was amazing for a good amount of time and you will learn so much from how to act around the people you love, to gaining so much patience just from this one relationship. You will be completely crushed when it’s over, but trust me, it will be ok. Better is coming. I’m not even sure if I’ve met better yet, but hopefully 30-year-old us has. Hopefully.
In just a few years, you will develop a disorder that will change your life. Don’t be scared. You’ll learn how to live and even thrive with it. It is called bipolar disorder and you can’t blame anyone for it. It happened because of genetics, so promise me you won’t be mad at yourself about it. It will give you mood swings, but you’ll find out who are truly your best friends and who are shallow. You’ll also learn to love Missy Hamel. What a woman. Cling to her, she’ll help you get through the rough years and constantly tell you that you are bigger than your bipolar disorder.
I didn’t realize how much I wanted to tell you until I started typing this. 10 years goes by so quickly, but so much happens. You’ll go through middle school, high school, the beginning of college, love, bipolar disorder, writing your first novel, writing your first song and finding who are you. I can only give you so much advice.
Just please enjoy it. Life can be great when you let it be. Take care of yourself kid and I’ll see you in 10 years.
Sincerely,
Twenty, Plenty and Crying