To understand this article I must explain its lore. It’s completely inspired by FX’s “hit” show Scream Queens. I use the term hit lightly because although it got canceled after its 2nd season, it still holds a special place in my heart and will forever be iconic. A satirical horror, the show follows the lives of college kids who are continuously followed by a serial killer. In the first season, we meet the Chanels, a posse of mean girls whose leader is Chanel Oberlin. All with the same name Chanel, they are given a number from Oberlin to help tell who is who. The number of the Chanel depends on how much Oberlin tolerates them.
So that is how these movies will be rated. On a Chanel scale, Chanel #5 is what I consider to be the least scariest, and Chanel Oberlin is the gut-wrenching horror. I would also like to mention there will only be Chanel 5, 3, 2 and Oberlin. Chanel #4 does not exist, due to an early death because of meningitis.
Chanel #5: Monster House (2006)
A Halloween classic, Monster House tells the story of three kids who try to defeat a house that is alive and profusely terrorizes children. With hopes of saving Halloween for the neighborhood, they face their fears of the house and its owner. The movie is computer-animated, an aspect I love because each character’s expression is prominent which adds to the movie’s comedic timing and jumpscares. Besides a great storyline, the characters help make the movie as special as it is. They all have big personalities that feel very real and despite it being animated, they have great chemistry with the other characters as well. My personal favorite, this movie screams Halloween and will forever be a classic to me!
Chanel #3: After 4 (2022)
This movie isn’t considered a horror movie, but it might as well be with all the terror Hardin brings to the screen. After is a movie series that follows the love story of Tessa and Hardin, a very toxic couple who bring out the worst in each other. Who constantly decide that they need time and distance apart but somehow always find their way back to each other. However, this movie does a great job of implying that they break up for good, leaving the audience to deal with its repercussions. This movie is very bad, which makes it worth watching. You know how in a bad movie, things that aren’t meant to be funny are? That is how I would sum up this film. A horror-comedy movie which I would watch on your own will.
Chanel #2: Ready or Not (2019)
This list would not be official unless a final girl movie is included and the girl of honor is Grace. Who quickly becomes Grace Le Domas as she marries the love of her life, Alex Le Domas. As their wedding night progresses, Grace’s happiest day of her life quickly turns into a nightmare. A common conception is that many people don’t like their in-laws, well not everyone gets to experience their in-laws trying to murder them. As Grace spends her wedding night running in fear of her in-laws who try to kill her, she quickly realizes that maybe marriage isn’t what she sought it to be. This movie gave me everything I needed from a final girl film. Samara Weaving who plays Grace plays the part well and gives one of the most shrilling horror screams I’ve ever heard. A majority of this movie takes place at night, which I would usually find boring, but the film did a good job of keeping me engaged. It also had me stressed due to the fear of Grace not running fast enough or not being able to hide well. Worth the watch, Ready or Not, the most favorite Chanel that isn’t Oberlin, is one I would recommend to any and everyone.
Chanel Oberlin: Us (2019)
A film that easily kept me awake in the middle of the night, Us follows a family who goes to a beach house to celebrate the summer. Adelaide, the mother of the family, is forcefully made to relive her past when she and her family encounter strangers who all carry familiar faces. I truly believe all of the actors in this movie deserve their flowers due to their wonderful acting skills. One thing I would like to highlight is each character’s choreography and diction. It was chilling watching the strangers move and talk the way that they did. I think it drove the horror concept and allowed the audience to be uncomfortable. To this day, I can’t get the image of the son crawling around the house. It was such a simple move but in the context of the movie, it was too much for me to handle. Another thing I need to highlight is the coloring of the film. One scene in particular that showcases the color grading is when Adelaide had a flashback, it was just so perfect and showcased the character’s facial expression of fear remarkably. I would also like to mention that the script is all around. It made me scared, laugh, and stunned at the plot twist at the end. My top horror movie, Us, takes the cake in this rating.