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“How to Turn a “No” Into a “Yes”” A Woman’s Response

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at VCU chapter.

We live in a time when a white, straight man can get six months jail time with three month’s probation for raping a woman unconsciously at the back of a dumpster. We live in a time where people are more concerned with the fact that a jock no longer has a sports career because they were convicted of rape, but don’t process the fact that the woman’s life is forever changed because SHE GOT RAPED. We live in a time when saying “no” apparently means “try harder” and “change my mind.” 

Despite the backlash that people as disgusting as Brock Turner have faced, Nick Savoy still had the AUDACITY to write this article on how to turn a “no” to a “yes.” Basically, a Rape Guide 101 ft. A Slight Disclaimer So That I Don’t Get in TOOOOOO Much Trouble. 

 

His intro reads;

“What separates the men from the boys is how you handle rejection – and how quickly you can turn things around.” No, Savoy, this is just what separates a rapist from a man that can actually handle rejection and leave the woman alone. 

He separated the article into different places for men to pick up women; at a bar, on a date, in bed, in a relationship. 

The now removed site does offer a cache of the first page showcasing his tips for “At a Bar”

“You approach her, give her your best opening line, but she wasn’t having it. What now?” 

HOW ABOUT LEAVING HER ALONE?! 

Shortly after, he explains that a certain buddy of his picked up a Victoria’s Secret Model because he was persistent. Listen, just because someone else won the lottery once doesn’t mean you will or that they will again. No, “plowing ahead anyway” is not going to change anyone else’s mind.

He then suggests that if a woman dismisses you in a “rude way” (He uses the phrase “move along, dork” okay, I didn’t know this was some ABC family scenario but I guess you’ll take whatever floats your boat, Savoy.) that you should be rude back! Now, I love me some witty banter, but with someone I specifically said yes to, not some asshole trying to be the Petruchio to my Kate.

Thanks to screenshots throughout the internet, we are able to see the “In bed” portion. In this part he says “No means no. You’d have to be a psychopath or an imbecile to dispute that” OH REALLY?

He continues “And sometimes there’s nothing you can do to change her mind. But sometimes you can if you know what her concerns are – and she’s not going to tell you.” No, no, no. A woman simply isn’t voicing her “concern” because she means just that – NO.

For someone that’s been “retired from dating coaching as of May 2016” he sure tried to get away with one last, and awful late June rape guide that goes out to millions of men throughout the country. Telling men that they can keep trying and trying after a woman is clearly not interested or has blatantly said “no,” is stimulating rape culture. 

 

And personally, if I was a guy reading this, I would not be taking “dating” tips from a guy that looks like Tobey Maguire in Spiderman 3. 

 

Jessica is a Theatre Major with a concentration in Costume Design. Although design is her passion, she loves writing and is so glad to be a part of Her Campus VCU. She hopes you enjoy her writing as much as she enjoys writing it.
Keziah is a writer for Her Campus. She is majoring in Fashion Design with a minor in Fashion Merchandising. HCXO!