I turned 20 on Friday, and honestly, I really don’t know how I’m feeling about it. On the one hand, it’s like nothing has really changed from 19, just the fact that I’m no longer a teenager. On the other hand, it feels like I have to have things figured out, like what I want academically and professionally and how I handle situations. Honestly, what is really daunting to me is entering a new decade. Yes, our 20’s are a time to find ourselves and grow as people, both personally and professionally, but it’s also the decade where we finish our education, look for and get jobs and potentially even commit to someone.
It really is daunting to know that you are no longer a teenager, your parents are no longer going to hold your hand every step of the way—they are letting us go out on our own and be independent to discover ourselves as a person. It’s also different for my parents now because they are no longer raising teenagers, my sister is 23, so it’s hard for them to come to terms with the fact that they need to let me and my sister develop our own personalities and go out and find what we are interested in without their help. Don’t get me wrong, I still go to my parents for almost everything, and I absolutely love them, but I might not need them that much anymore—which is just an indicator of me becoming my own person.
With all that being said, I still feel the same as I did at 19, I think everyone kind of just makes it a big deal because you are no longer a teen, but it is not much different. It’s not like the day I turned 20 something just magically changed in me, but I do admit that this has been one of my best birthdays! I definitely feel more confident in myself and starting to love myself for the person I am—I still have so much to grow and learn, but I am proud of the person I am right now and that took a very long time for me. I have learned to keep the friends who I know will always be there for me no matter what and limit conversation with those who only talk to me when they need something; I am still loved and supported by those friends.
20 doesn’t have to be daunting, I just feel like I’ve started a new chapter in my life, and so far, I am loving it!