As we fall sets in, it is the perfect time to evaluate our own beings in order to see what we want to get out of this season. I am always looking for an excuse to overanalyze my being and try to improve myself. For this fall equinox, a group of friends and I got together and we each thought about people we wanted to forgive and wrote down the names. Then, we went through everything we are grateful for: our education, our health and cinnamon chai lattes. Following that, we went through the things we wanted to be grateful for in the months to come. Doing this, I was able to examine where I am now and the specific things I want to come.
So, if your friends aren’t into candlelit equinox get-togethers, how do you set your own goals? Not to mention how do you set your own goals when school and the world are constantly setting goals for you? (high GPA, relationship status, perfected material, etc.)
Step One:
Pencil and paper. Yes, I know you think you can write notes on your iPad with a stylus or mentally remember your goals. You are wrong. Get out your favorite pen (everyone should have a favorite pen) and a scrap of paper and sit down, free from your phone and all technology. Stare at this paper. Breathe. Then, write what you like about the present. This will help you maintain the positives. After that, write about what you don’t like about the present. This will give you things to look at to see if you want to change any of your habits, manners of responding, etc in order to reduce the negativity in your life.
Step Two:
Scotch tape. (or dollar store tape if you are me) Tape that sucker up in your room. Maybe tape it on the back of the door or right above your desk, wherever you will see it frequently. Read it when you pass it- don’t just glaze over it. This will keep you on point.
Step Three:
Monitor your progress. Set a time frame (for me it’s three weeks) and put a reminder in your phone to sit down and journal about how your advances are going. Have you lost some of the positive things you hoped to maintain? Have you banished some negativity from your life?
Step Four:
Re-evaluate. After monitoring, you may need to adjust some of your goals. Maybe you will realize something wasn’t so negative after all or maybe you need to change your approach to fixing something. Whatever it is, fix it and persevere.
Step Five:
Conclude. At the end of your season or time frame, (you will get a feeling when it is time to begin again, or you can set an end date) take a new sheet of paper and write about how this process went. Maybe even keep a journal! This will help you to look at new things in the next season and look back on things from the past and how you got through it all.
Yes, the world is constantly pressuring you to fit its requirements and expectations. However, you need to create expectations for yourself to grow in the manners you think are right. Continue to grow through this season and all to come. Do not remain stagnant or feel the need to succumb to others’ expectations.