In relationships, it’s important that you don’t allow your feelings to cloud your judgment. You may want to overlook red flags that arise, but instead of doing what you’re tempted to, try paying attention to behaviors that may indicate that your relationship is unhealthy instead. You deserve to be in a happy and loving relationship, and just because you are in love with someone, doesn’t necessarily mean you are meant to be with them or that the relationship is serving you. Here are five warning signs that you are in an unhealthy relationship that needs work—or just may need to end altogether.
- They Frequently Lie
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Honesty and trust are the pillars of a healthy relationship. If your partner lies to you, even if it’s a lie of omission, then that is an issue. Lying about smaller things can seem like it’s not a big deal, but it is usually indicative of a larger issue. People who lie have something to hide, and sometimes lying becomes so familiar that they find themselves lying about things they could easily be honest about. If your partner is lying to you, it likely means that they are doing something that they know would upset you, which is not okay. If certain boundaries are set in the relationship, and they are comfortable going against them and hiding it from you, then they do not genuinely care about you. Someone who genuinely cares for you would never do something to intentionally hurt you.
- They Dismiss Your Concerns
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Certain things that may seem like a big issue to you may seem little to your partner, but that does not mean they should dismiss any concerns you may bring up. Your partner should care that something is upsetting you and want to resolve the issue in any way that they can. If they aren’t making any effort to change or resolve the issue, then that is a problem. You deserve someone who cares about your wellbeing and is willing to empathize with you. If they are not willing to do that and just want to continue on as normal at your expense, then they are not worth your time.
- They Are Controlling
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Your partner should never dictate what you do. You are your own person and are capable of making your own decisions. If your partner is telling you you’re not allowed to go to certain places, wear certain things or hang out with certain people, then your partner likely has some controlling tendencies. Relationships center around trust, and a lot of control issues stem from insecurity, but it is your partner’s responsibility to work through their insecurities on their own. It is unacceptable for them to try to force you to do anything that you don’t want to just because they are insecure.
- They Make You Feel Inadequate
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Your partner should always make you feel loved, accepted and worthy. If they question your worth in any way, then they do not truly care for you. Your partner should be the person that uplifts you and reminds you of how great you are, not the person that tears you down. You should never leave a conversation with your partner and feel like you’re not good enough or worthless! You have so much to offer, and you should only be with someone who realizes that and appreciates you for who you are.
- They Yell At You In A Disrespectful Manner
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Even if your partner is upset with you, they should not be disrespectful in any way. You can demonstrate your anger and frustration without disrespecting the person that you claim to care about, and if they don’t seem capable of doing that, then they do not care for you as much as they claim to. You deserve someone who would never want to hurt or disrespect you in any way, no matter the circumstances. There are healthier ways to work through conflict than throwing insults at one another or calling each other profane words.
If your partner does any of the things I have mentioned to look out for, then I strongly urge you to consider whether it is worth it to move forward with the relationship. It can be hard to leave someone you love, but you deserve more than what they are giving you. Listen to the warning signs—don’t ignore them.